Avengers Theatre Presents: Fright Night!
by Flocculent Aura
Summary: In this parody of the 2011 movie, Fright Night, Steve Rogers is semi-normal high school student living in Nevada with his adoptive-mother Natasha. And after a string of disappearances in the neighborhood, Steve suspects that his new neighbor, Thor, is a vampire. Contains spoilers to Fright Night.**COMPLETE**
1. Coulson Dies

**Avengers Theatre Presents: Fright Night!**

**Intro: Coulson Dies. **

* * *

A bloody gurgle escaped the vampire's latest victim, as their throat was seized tightly in his supernatural grip, and squeezed to the point of imminent asphyxiation.

Phil gasped aloud, as he watched his twin-sister, Lil', be choked so brutally by the hulking stranger that loomed over her nearly lifeless form; his knees were pressing dangerously into her sternum, and Phil could have sworn he heard her lower ribs crack under the vampire's immense weight.

His gasp turned to a cry of despair, when the vampire's already vice-like grip on Lil's neck tightened; until the woman no longer made noise, and he lifted her head and shoulders the short distance they could go, before he slammed her down against the headboard and cracked her skull.

Phil couldn't bear to watch the vampire sink his fangs into the now-dearly departed Lillian Coulson; instead he picked himself off the floor—where the vampire had thrown him; when he had first entered the room, what felt like a few moments ago—and, took off for the door.

The vampire's fangs make a sickening sound, as they pierced Lil's flesh, and Phil tried to block it out, as he lunged for the doorway. Grabbing the arch, Phil took a deep breath of courage, before he legged it down the hallway.

His muscles and joints ached and creaked; letting it be known that they were not used to the amount of physical exertion. If Phil survived this ordeal, god damn it, he was gonna get on the treadmill!

Tearing down the hall like a bat out of hell, Phil grabbed every end table or photo that littered the area around him and knocked them to the floor to try and slow the vampire's pursuit, if he decided to give chase.

He seemed quite distracted with drinking Lil's life-blood, so it didn't seem likely that he would stop, just because Phil had escaped, but... Phil wasn't going to take any second chances, he'd seen the horror movies; he wasn't going to meander around and wait for the vampire to come get him!

Phil legged it like never before—quite literally, like never before; because, Phil had never had to run this hard and this fast for anything in his entire life—until he got to the apex of the hallway, and fell, to keep from crashing into the wall. Though, instead of acting like a blonde-bombshell in a B-rank Horror flick, he didn't stay down for long. Scrambling to his feet, Phil shook off the pain in the shoulder he had fallen onto, and crossed the remaining half of the hallway with near admirable speed.

Once he was at the stairwell, Phil almost cried with relief. Throwing his arms out to catch the railing, the man sprinted down the stairs. Taking each step a pair at a time, Phil almost stumbled on his sock-clad toes, but caught himself at the last moment. A sigh of relief, and a hop down the last few steps later, and Phil was on the landing almost pissing himself with joy.

That joy tingled all the way down to the pit of his stomach, and tied itself into a thick knot, when he realized that, while he could be escaping, right about now; his family was dead, murdered in their own house by a unholy creature—and, the next thing he knew, Phil was lurching forward and puking his guts out on the floor.

The remnants of this morning's breakfast and lunch burned, as it churned and bubbled up his esophagus and out of his mouth, and Phil's eyes stung, as he tried to keep from retching loudly; holding his stomach, Phil road out the vomit session as quietly as possible, before righting himself and wiping his mouth on the sleeve of his shirt.

His recovery time was surprisingly quick; but, that was probably because he heard the sounds of the vampire upstairs moving on the bed, it's springs creaking and moaning with every shift of his body—and, Phil was looking around for a place to run...to hide!

His eyes locked on the first thing he saw, and they immediately lit up with glee! From where he stood, he could see the front door; the wooden door, brass knob and the stained glass window sparkled like a beacon of salvation. _Oh, my god! He was going to get out of here!_

All he had to do was stay _just _quiet enough, and he could get to the door and get the hell out of dodge! Oh, and from the front door; he could get to the front yard, and then, from there; he could get to a neighbor's house, and then... then...

His dog, Cap'n America, who was AWOL, up until now, decided to make his grand entrance by letting out a shrill series of loud barks!

"_NOOOOO!" _Phil sobbed aloud, despite himself, as he lunged forward; arms flying forward to try and catch the mutt, so he could silence it! The dog let out another string of what seemed to be taunting yips, before he turned and dashed towards the door; he slipped through the doggie-door with ease and was probably gone to tell his dog friends how he screwed his owner over.

For a moment, the noise upstairs ceased, and Phil wondered just what the hell the vampire was doing; but, then the man quickly gathered his wits and decided it was either now or never-he had to make a choice; hide or make a mad dash for the door.

His decision was made for him, when he heard the vampire let out an uncharacteristic roar—one that was so loud, so fear-inducing, that Phil could have sworn the creature was right behind him! And, when the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end, Phil felt pretty-friggin'-sure that the vampire was breathing on him, right about now!

A whimper lodged itself in Phil's throat, as the man took off in the other direction from the door, towards a dimly lit hallway. At this rate, he would never make it out through the front door, and the back door was inaccessible—it was boarded up, because his sister liked to bring her boyfriend's into the house, using it—he would either have to wait until the vampire got bored—or, until daybreak... which, unfortunately meant that he would have to hide.

He wasn't ever too good at hide and seek... hopefully, this wouldn't end like all those other times; maybe he wouldn't be found, if he chose a good enough spot!

Running down the scantly lit corridor, Phil felt on the walls and soon familiarized himself with the area. This was the hallway that led to his parents' bedroom-holy shit, he mentally swore, as a realization slapped him across the face. The master bedroom had a window in there, one large enough for him to climb out of; he still had a chance to escape!

With renewed vigor, Phil ran the rest of the way, his hands feeling the walls and doors, so that he could keep count of how many rooms he passed. Eventually, his fingers touched the fourth door, and he grinned, knowing it to be the door to his parent's room.

Groping around for the knob, Phil hastily opened the door and slipped into the room. Closing it behind him, the man searched for and found a means of barricading the door; his parents' dresser!

Pulling and pushing with all his might—at some point, he had to pull the drawers out, and stack them elsewhere; just to get the dresser to budge, it was just that so friggin' heavy—until it was pressed against the door, Phil let out a sigh of relief, before turning around to survey the room.

He didn't have to look for long, to see that the vampire had already been in the room. The proof was right there, in his face. His mother and father, Mr. and Mrs. Coulson, were dead on the floor, by their bed. Slaughtered like animals... their faces were heavily gored and... God, he couldn't stand to look any longer!

Putting a hand to his mouth, to keep from any more vomiting, Phil choked on a sob, as he looked away from his parents slain bodies… to think, his sister... Lil' was just upstairs, and she probably killed just like this...

Phil had to cut his mourning short, when he heard the sound of the vampire trotting down the stairs, as loud as he could possibly be. The bastard was toying with him! But... Why!

Having no time to guess the vampire's MO, Phil completely forgot about his plan of climbing out the window, and instead went for the bed. Dropping to his hands and knees, Phil quickly apologized to his deceased father, before climbing over him and then under the spacious, queen-sized bed. With all the covers on it, the bed was harder to see under, from the perspective of someone entering the room; Phil was going to use this to his advantage.

As he plotted out a way to escape, Phil was completely unaware of the numbing silence that swept throughout his over-turned home—it wasn't until the door was being literally ripped from its hinges, did Phil come back to reality. Ah, crap! The vampire had found him!

The sound of the door being snapped in half made Phil jump and cover his mouth to keep from shouting. OH, SHIIIIIIT! He was going to die! His gruesome thoughts only intensified, when the vampire threw the door fragments all the way down the hallway—how did Phil know that the creature threw the remains down the hall? It all crashed into glass, and the only glass in the corridor was the window at the far side.

The noise only escalated in volume, when the vampire kicked the dresser out of the doorway. The large piece of furniture caught major air, as it sailed across the room and crashed out of the window, at speeds that could not have been generated by any explainable force created by someone of the human-shape.

Crossing his fingers, Phil prayed. He prayed like never before, as the vampire approached the bed. His big, black leather boots thudding with each menacing step he took. The sound and vibrations reverberating in Phil's chest; like a drum solo being beaten out by Death, himself!

Phil's eyes stayed glued to those boots, as the vampire walked around the room, and they almost shut, when the creature stood within arms-reached, so that he could lean down and collect the bodies of the Coulson parents. When the vampire left the room with Mrs. Coulson, Phil scooted back from the edge of the bed, until he found himself near the center. He was screwed; like totally screwed!

And, alas, his final thoughts were brutally confirmed, when the vampire returned to the room and made a beeline for the bed.

A scream, Phil's scream, echoed through the quiet house, as the vampire grabbed the bed by the corner and hefted it upright to reveal the quavering Phil. The creature flashed his fangs; before he sent the flipping towards the nearest wall with a flick of his wrist.

Phil only had a moment to react, before the vampire attacked him—and, he chose that split second to try and call for help.

Too bad no one could hear him, or any of the other Coulson's, during the attack.


	2. Steve Romanoff?

**AN: **_Thanks to all those who read the first chapter, and thank you Anonymous Reviewer: 8Fangirl8, for reviewing! We were going to wait until tomorrow to post this next chapter, but got way too impatient. So, here it is! Now, I'm gonna go upload the other chapter!_

**Chapter one: Steve Romanoff?  
**

* * *

Steve cursed under his breath, as he dragged his useless motorcycle through the neighborhood. He had tried to ride the damned thing to school, but it turned out to be a bust. What rendered the bike useless was the bent out of shape front-tire and the fact that the engine wouldn't start, even with a jump, or a fuel tank of gas.

That's what he gets for bumming auto parts from the neighborhood junk yard; Steve shook his head morosely at the thought.

As he journeyed back home; his whorish, under-aged neighbor greeted him; effectively interrupting his little 'walk of shame', "Hey, Stevey!" She cooed, "I see you're flaunting those bodacious thighs. Keep that up and you'll have a sugar daddy to pay your way through college!"

In the spur of the moment, Steve replied with, "Keep showing them titties and you'll find a Splenda daddy..." A second of confusion passed his thoughts, 'What the hell did I just say?'

Those words shocked the young woman deeply. She couldn't muster up a reply because good old Steve stated the obvious. Knowing full well that he couldn't salvage the conversation, Steve took the moment of silence as a sign to leave.

The man took a total of nine steps, and arrived in front of his drive way. His adopted mother, Natasha Romanoff, stood in the garage, (she adopted a man 70 years her senior) arms crossed. "Here I thought you would finally put the moves on that slut."

Steve quickly corrected her, "Hey, she is not a slut. Tia is a stripper, there is a difference."

Natasha waved off his nonsense, and continued with her previous activity. "Hey, can you give me a hand with these sign posts? I need to get these up."

Steve stepped into the garage, and grabbed a pile of posts. "Seriously, mom, no one wants to live out here. Just give it up!"

Natasha looked back at him incredulously, "Of course, people want to live here!" she continued, while gesturing towards the nearby lawn, which had a large WM waste dumpster, a broken toilet and a well-kept bust, which strangely resembled William Shatner. "We just have asses like this jerk next door, who takes pleasure in sucking the life out of other's property values!"

As Natasha rambled on, Steve's thoughts slowly shifted to a strange place. "I wonder if it's too late to sex her. I mean really, is it illegal to screw your adopted mother?" he thought as his eyes slowly traced the curves of Natasha's body.

Noticing that Steve was hardly paying attention, Natasha shouted at the man, "Are you even listening!" seeing that her words weren't getting to him, Natasha whacked him with a post.

He reacted to the impact, but he still wasn't fully there; so, she gave him another whack to the dome. This time, Steve cried out in pain, and snatched the wooden post from her grip. "Damn it witch, STOP!"

Steve's outburst stunned Natasha for a second, but she wasn't going to let him off easy. As she was about to retort, a car horn sounded off in the background.

Steve turned around to see his girlfriend had arrived. He was glad to see her-because, last night, he had called her and told her he would get to school on his own, VIA his banged up motorcycle, and yet, she still showed up... as if, she knew his bike wouldn't work, and that he would still need a ride-and, yet, he was terrified by the sight that he saw, when she pulled off her do-rag and revealed her hair!

Oh, my god... it was platinum-blonde! Steve gawked, but tried not to appear so obviously disturbed by Maria's recently bleached hair, as he leaned down and picked his backpack off the lawn. It was a bad habit of his, leaving his school-bag outside, on the driveway, when he got home from school every day. Sooner or later, someone was going to steal his homework.

Slinging it over his shoulder, Steve turned to Natasha, "That's my ride, I'll see you later, mom."

The ex-Russian spy bristled and glared at being called 'mom', "Shut up, Steve."


	3. Clint's Arrival

**Chapter two: Clint's arrival.**

* * *

What happened between him getting in the car, with Maria and her friends and getting to school, was a blur to him. It was as if he had been hit by a wave, and the memory of the time in-between was washed out, but somehow Steve found himself in the hallway, at school, standing an arms-length away from Maria, as she straightened his over-shirt out and gabbed on about class and whatnot.

"—so, like, that's why seniors don't go to the prom. It's not cool." Maria continued to say, unaware of Steve's wandering mind. When she finally was satisfied with the arrangement of his clothes, Maria got on her toes and tried to give Steve a kiss. Her lips were scant inches away from her boy(old man)friend's stubble-clad chin, and then...

In a blur of movement, Steve wedged his hand between Maria's mouth and his face, and pushed the younger woman away. The force in which he used was tremendous, so much so, that Maria's head jerked back, her chin snapped up, and she bit her tongue stumbling back. Steve watched his girlfriend crumble like a house of cards onto the floor, but instead of offering to help her up, he scratched the back of his head. "Uh... don't you have class?"

Gasps and whispers erupted throughout the hallway, but no student dared to speak, even as Maria scrambled to her feet with blood dripping from the corner of her mouth. Gurgling, the brunette tried to save the moment. This wasn't the first time Steve used his immense strength and hurt her, and she wasn't going to get him arrested again over a flesh-wound. Spitting out the blood, Maria wiped her chin with the back of her hand and said, "I'll, uh... I'll see you after class..." and then, she stumbled away, as if in a daze.

The students that littered the halls scattered like cockroaches exposed to the fridge-light, and the only ones that remained were Steve's douchebag friends; Bruce Banner and Tony Stark, they came scurrying towards him like hungry wolverines.

"What was that, man?" Bruce hollered loudly, as though he wished for everyone to listen in on the conversation. "She just tried to give you a kiss! What's the harm in that? You afraid that, if you kiss her, 70 years of pent up sexual frustration's gonna come to the surface and you'll—"

"No need for the mental image, Bruce... seriously!" Tony cringed, his mind undoubtedly being assaulted by thoughts of Steve and Maria doing 'things', gross things. Shuddering, the Genius-Billionaire-Playboy-Philanthropist turned and looked to Steve with narrowed brown eyes, "I've got a bone to pick with you—why are you with Maria, anyway, Steve?"

"She had a charm to her, and there was something about that plain Jane look she had." Steve answered, as he leaned against the wall, "Now she looks like Tia's twin sister. The worst part is; I bet she can't even do half the things Tia can." Frustrated by Maria's new appearance and recent whorish tendencies, Steve punched the locker nearest to him.

Tony and Bruce eyed their friend warily, the man has never shown this much emotion for ugly Betty. The two friends attempted to shift his thoughts to something more pleasant; like Shawarma. As they chatted, Tony spotted Clint Barton coming their way. "Legolas is approaching our position; time to hit the road!" With that, the playboy ran down the hall.

The only remaining souls in the hall way were Bruce, Steve and Clint. "I need to speak with you alone." Clint urged his former friend. Steve tried to blow him off with the middle finger, but Clint wasn't having any of it. "Your boyfriend can wait, what I have is urgent"

Bruce took offense to Clint's words and he was ready to bludgeon the archer, when Steve held him back. "Hey, it's not worth it. Just go." Bruce bottled up his anger and stomped off down the hall, his skin tinged a pale shade of green and his clothes bursting at the seams to keep him in them.

Steve turned back to the shorter man and spoke, "What do you want?"

Clint took this moment to speak, "Have you noticed that Coulson hasn't shown up to class in a few days" He continued "I want to check on Phil later tonight. Please, I need you to come along."

Steve mulled over the request. "Nah, Coulson was weird. Besides he's probably out of town."

Clint scoffed, "Please, like he has the money for such things. He lives in his mother's basement, for Pete's sake!" The Archer's expression then changed; took on a more mysterious vibe. Steve shuddered; he knew this wasn't going to end well for him.

"Besides, if you don't go, I'll show Maria's mom a copy of your birth certificate and a list of the numerous underage girls you were with. I've also got video of your 'escapades'; you know, Steve, I didn't remember you having so many freckles on your—"

"Okay, okay! I'll go—I'll meet you after class, and we'll go to Phil's house."


	4. Meeting Him

**Chapter three: Meeting Him...**

* * *

Steve dreaded that venture to Phil's house, and the dread only intensified when he was sitting in class, and the teacher called out the missing student's name; only to be answered with absolute silence.

So, when class was over; Steve happily piled into Maria's Bug, and awkwardly patted the woman on the shoulder as a show of appreciation for her dedicated carpooling. The ride back to his house was excruciatingly silent, but neither of them bothered to break the serenity streak, until they arrived in front of Steve's house and spotted Natasha and a kneeling, (and not to mention incredibly muscular) blonde on the front yard.

"Who's that?" Maria asked, as she put the car in park and turned the key in the ignition to kill the engine. Leaning over her door, the brunette tried to get a better look at the handsome stranger, without getting out of the car. "He's a hottie." She cooed, as she watched the man's back muscles quiver and flex, as he dug a small hole in the yard with a comically tiny spade. "Gives off that ethereal glow, you know?... Hey! Steve where are you going?"

He got out the car, and slammed the door on Maria's complaints. She was becoming just like Tia; obnoxious and insensitive... didn't she know that it hurt his feelings when she talked about other men!

Steve sniffled, and wiped a stray tear from his eye, as he walked around the car and approached his adopted-mother and the hunky handy-man.

Natasha immediately crossed her arms, and took on a look of extreme disdain as Steve neared her. "What do you want?" She looked down at the shirtless man. "Can't you see that I'm trying to put the moves on him?" The man looked up at Steve, he noticed that the guy's eyes seemed unfocused.

_'Either this dude was a shady character, or he has some sort of condition...'_

Steve thought, eyeing the man warily. Eventually, Steve and the blonde man made eye-contact; it was only for a moment, but it was enough to unnerve Steve.

Watching from the vehicle, Maria saw how tense the three people were, so she took it upon herself to slice the tension. She got out of the car and walked up to the trio.

When Natasha spotted Steve's whore approaching, she made sure to claim the hunk on the ground. "This is Thor, he just moved in." "He said that he likes the neighborhood and he thinks I AM PRETTY" Natasha made sure to emphasize those last three words to Maria. The other woman looked affronted, as she turned away from Natasha and tried to focus on Thor.

Staring at the women, Thor stood up and wiped his hands on his designer jeans. Somehow, despite his hands being downright filthy, not a speck of dirt rubbed onto his pants; which, was really weird, because, his hands were still getting clean. "Nice to meet you all." He greeted; his deep, heavily-accented voice sending sparks of fan girlism and arousal through the two ladies standing by him.

Maria made a dash for Thor's large, manly hands, as he extended one of them for a shake; but, her target was blocked by Steve's own manly hand. "Nice to meet you, sir." Thor caught Steve's hand in a vice-like grip, and raised it to his lips before kissing the back of it softly. Steve yanked his hand away, when Thor parted his lips to try and lick him, and back-handed the neighbor.

The sound that erupted from the aggressive contact echoed throughout the neighborhood, and, any or all of the other residents that were outside scurried back into their homes, out of fear that they would be attacked next.

Unfazed, Thor turned to Maria. "What a maiden..." He said slowly. This made Maria blush. Thor continued. "Must have looked beautiful before the dog mangled your face" He raised his hand to brush it against her face, but Maria swatted it down.

Seeing as just about everyone had taken turns smacking Thor, Natasha cleared her throat, before she spoke up, "So... Thor said that he would move that crap in the other yard, tomorrow. Isn't that wonderful?"

Steve looked at Natasha, "I don't care what he does, as long as it gets you to shut up."

Thor raised his brow, "You know what else will get her to shut up?" The trio stood on edge, as they waited for the blonde to finish his statement. He took a total of forty-five minutes, before he finally answered, "-some mead. I'm sure Lady Natasha would spare you a few moments of silence, if you gave her some mead."

By this time, Steve had checked his phone several times over, and had received several threatening text messages from Clint. Sighing harshly, the man put his phone back into his pocket; which was a hard task, given that his pants were so tight that the top button was about to pop out. "I'm gonna have to go; I left something at... the thing..." Steve turned around and started walking away, "Don't let him in the house, Natasha! Remember what the agent at the adoption-place said! I need stability; that means that you can't bring creepy men into the house!"

Natasha rolled her eyes, "Yeah, right... I'll do whatever the hell I want!"

"You should listen to Steve, you know. You only adopted him seven months ago, the Adoption Agency is still investigating you. What if Steve reports Thor's amorous greeting as sexual harassment?" Maria reasoned, reapplying makeup onto her face to cover up the redness that cropped up due to her recent crying. Thor's statement about her face being maimed, hurt her feelings more than the man would ever know. Sticks and Stones may break bones; but words will hurt forever.

Natasha grimaced, "Shut up, Hill."


	5. Late Night at Phil's

**Chapter four: Late Night at Phil's**

* * *

Steve's journey to Phil's house took longer than he expected-but, that's probably because he had to reply to all of Clint's text messages, (all forty of them) and he couldn't walk and text at the same time-but, when he got there, the super-soldier found the archer sitting on the steps, waiting for him. He was shouting obscenities at his phone like a maniac.

Steve debated if he should turn back and go home; but soon realized that that wouldn't be an option, because, not before long, Clint spotted him! Damn it, there goes American Idol, tonight... Steve thought, morosely, as he waved back at Clint, as the archer motioned him over.

Approaching Clint, Steve took a deep breath of resolve, before letting it out and standing tall, so that he towered over the fair-haired man. "Listen here, Clint, I'm not staying out here all night. So, here's the plan: we go in, check things out and then I'm going home. Deal?"

Clint agreed and the two went up to the front door. Steve rang the door bell while Clint banged on the door. "What are you doing? The guy could probably hear the door bell. You don't need to knock like the police." Clint ignored Steve's words and proceeded to open the front door.

He groped around his cream colored sweater and pulled out a stake. Steve eyed the wooden piece. "Listen man, Coulson and I have noticed that several people-along with students-came up missing around the same time Thor moved in. At first, we thought it was a coincidence, but, no it isn't. People are still being abducted, and he's the only person here that looks shady all the time; so, we decided to investigate him."

The pair searched the living room before heading upstairs. "During our research, we came to the conclusion that your neighbor, Thor, is a vampire; and as your former-best friend, I would like to advise you not to ever invite him into your house, ever."

Steve pondered the idea for a moment, before logic took over. 'Thor, a vampire? Seriously, the man could pass for a rapist before a vampire... but, be him either or, it was still handy advice not to let Thor in his house.' The two checked the master bedroom before heading back to Phil's room. "You have any proof of this?"

Clint stopped and turned back. "Of course, I do, and why are you questioning everything I'm saying?"

Steve stared at the shorter man."Because, this all sounds ridiculous; and I know you're just doing this to get me to talk with you."

Clint gasped loudly, and slowly raised his hand to his mouth. "I am doing this because Coulson was my friend, OUR FRIEND, and you're acting as if you don't care that he disappeared!" Steve looked down in shame. "Just because you became the new 'It' guy, doesn't mean you have to cut your real friends out of the picture."

Clint moved closer to Steve, close enough to breath on the other man's ear. "And because of your douchebag behavior, I want you to feel the loss that Phil and I felt" Steve looked at Clint, waiting in suspense. Barton stepped away from the other man with smirk, and quietly said. "I took it upon myself to show your girlfriend the loving that she so craves."

Steve flared with rage and charged the smaller man. With all the strength he could muster, Steve punched Clint directly in the throat. The archer crumbled in pain, his wind piped was crushed under the force of the blow.

As the smaller man slowly died on the floor, Steve rushed out of the room. He paused in the hallway before hurrying down the stairs to the front door.

While laying there, Clint heard the front door slam shut. He closed his eyes as he slowly suffocated on the floor. As he laid there, he heard a noise coming from some where in the room. He opened his eyes and saw a shadowy figure break through the window and the person quickly approached him. Up close, Clint could make out the face of Thor. The vampire slowly descended on his next meal. "Num, num.."


	6. Blazed

**Chapter five: Blazed**

* * *

The next morning, Steve laid in his room. Seemingly depressed that his girlfriend (this word is used loosely) would cheat on him. As he lie there, his thoughts went to the dirt that Barton had on him.

Steve began to think of ways to retrieve the information when his mother called his name from outside. "Steve, get your lazy ass up. Its time to go!" Natasha shouted. Outside, Maria just stood on the lawn next to Steve's mother, unsure if she should even be there.

Some time later at school, Steve listened as the teacher did roll call. It some-what pained him to know exactly why Barton was missing from class. But he knew that it was the right thing to do.

After school, Steve made his way to Clint's home. It was near the outer edges of the community. When he arrived at the house, Steve picked up a stone from Barton's rock garden. He then walked straight into the back yard and used his extraordinary strength to propel himself onto the roof.

He moved towards Clint's window and smashed it open with the stone. Inside, he scanned the area. What he saw was damning evidence that would surely land him in legal trouble. Normally, something like this would freak him out, but this time, Steve came prepared for anything. He brought three bottles of lighter fluid and a box of matches.

While he was dousing the room with the liquid. He spotted some pictures on the desk. A map of the neighbor with indicators showing where people had went missing. Steve decided to look for this 'so-called' proof of vampires.

Soon he was raiding Clint's laptop. What he found were several videos, which, showed floating wheel barrels, shovels and other strange activities outside of Thor's house. He listened to the commentary of his former friends and it saddened him.

As soon as the last video finished, Steve took what he thought was important and then he set the room a blaze. Climbing out the window, Steve moved towards the edge of the roof before leaping into a nearby back yard.


	7. Mead Please

**Chapter six: Mead Please**

* * *

Late that evening, Steve strolled down the sidewalk in thought. 'Holy shit, I live next door to a vampire?' He looked around the nearby area, hoping that the creep wouldn't jump out at any second.

Suddenly his thoughts reminded him of something important. 'I forgot to American Idol!' He quickened his pace until he spotted his house. Steve rushed up the drive way but tripped over the recycle bin that was left outside. The man fell to the ground, cursing under his breath. He stood up and dragged the bin back to its usual place.

When he turned around, his creepy neighbor was standing right there. "Oh shit..." He moved back. "How's it going?" Thor's intense stare bothered Steve, but he wouldn't outwardly show it.

"Isn't it a glorious night to be outside?" The blonde awkwardly smiled at Steve.

"Yeah...I came back from a evening stroll." Steve supplied quietly, as he tried to calm his beating heart. This asshole was going to give him a freakin' heart attack.

Thor, not paying any mind to what Steve had said, continued with, "It's an even better night to break into someone's house, and punch your friend in the neck."

Steve startled at Thor's words, but when he tried to defend himself, the blonde seemed to have had a move swing and went on to change the subject to something completely different.

"I don't mean to impose, but-Sir Steve, may I inquire on your mead situation?" Thor continued to speak, when Steve floundered; he was completely dumbfounded by the question, "I have this fair maiden at my home, wishing to engage in sexual acts with me. However, before we may commence the intercourse, she would like to partake in the consumption of ale." He looked into the light, allowing it to cast shadows over his godly features. "May I have some, if your mother does not mind? I will return the favor, given the opportunity."

Steve looked thunderstruck, as his mind raced to supply him with a reply to Thor's request. "Uh... Mead? You mean, like, beer?" When Thor nodded, Steve found himself doing the same. "Uh, y-yeah, we have some... and, no she won't mind. She keeps it for show; the woman hardly eats or drinks anything. I'll go get it for you."

Mentally praying, Steve turned and made a beeline for the backyard. No normal grown man in his right mind would follow a high school student (no matter how old they looked) into their backyard... unless, they were on Dateline's: to catch a predator, of course.

Alas, Thor was no ordinary man. Not only did he follow Steve into the backyard, but he also did so without allowing much more than a pinky's length between them. Steve shuddered, as he felt Thor's hot, musty breath stir the hair on the back of his neck. What was this guy's deal? He thought, as Thor brushed up against him from behind, when Steve didn't walk fast enough.

_Oh, god... that'd better be one of his work tools!_

Steve almost ran out of his shoes trying to get away from Thor; but, luckily for him, he didn't have to resort to any outlandish tactics to get away, as when they arrived at the backdoor, Thor stopped short of the doorway, allowing Steve to walk in his home without being followed.

The super-soldier almost did a jig to celebrate, but held the impulse at bay, when he realized that Thor was still standing on his back-porch; watching him intensely with those menacing, light blue eyes of his.

He remembered that he still had to get Thor some mead-er, beer-and so Steve turned and faced Thor, "We don't have any cold ones; my mom only keeps kegs, is that alright with you?"

Thor nodded, "It is quite fine, Sir Steve."

"It's just Steve, no 'Sir' needed." The man corrected, heading over to the pantry and yanking the door open to reveal two, large kegs stacked on top of one another. As Steve bent down to unfasten the kegs from the floor, Thor admired the view... of the kitchen from the doorway.

"You have a nice kitchen." Thor complimented smoothly, looking around. His eyes drifted from the decorated walls to the floor, and finally they found Steve's foot and traveled up his leg to his strong upper-thighs. "That is some well polished wood you have there."

Steve cringed at the man's words. He lifted the first keg and brought it to the back door, he then turned back to retrieve the last one. Getting anxious, Thor shifted in his spot. He watched the muscular man in the kitchen grip the second keg awkwardly. Steve lifted it up slightly, and lost his grip. The keg dropped on Steve's foot and the man let out a string of curses.

Seeing this, Thor readily offered to help carry the keg to the door. "No!" Steve looked down. "I mean, I can carry it myself."

Steve brought over the second keg to the door and set it down in front of Thor. Not wanting to hand over the metallic containers and any risk physical contact, he kicked the first keg outside. He watched how it passed through the doorway, before Thor made any attempts to grab for it. Trying to see if Barton's words were true, Steve tilted the second towards Thor. The blonde-haired man raised his hand, but it never passed the door's wooden paneling.

Steve eyed Thor for a bit, before kicking the second keg out the door to join It's counterpart.

The two stood in silence for a little while. Steve not sure what to do, began shutting the door on his neighbor, when Thor spoke, "I wonder what it's like to live alone, with a beautiful woman, such as your mother."

Although the neighbor kept speaking, Steve still closed the door and secured the chain in place. He debated with himself for a moment before cracking the door open. He noticed that Thor was still speaking; it was as if the ethereal man had not just had a door slammed in his face.

If he wasn't a vampire, Thor was a freakin' loon-and so, Steve closed the door again, and secured every single lock that Natasha had installed when she was dating Patrick Bateman, and turned to find something to get his mind off the fact that Thor still had yet to leave.


	8. Peeping Steve?

**A\N:** _Again, thanks to all that reviewed, favorited, and alerted this story! Before we begin this chapter, we just want to ask all of you guys for more reviews on this story. You don't have to add this subscriptions-you don't have to favorite; but, reviews are loved. We're nearing the homescretch of this story, and let me just say that we are getting tired of Fright Night! We can only watch it and research it so many times, before we want to kick all the characters in the face! So, please to keep us from going insane, leave us a review; signed or anonymous, it doesn't matter!_

_Also... what other film\series would you like to see Avengers Theatre Present, after the conclusion of this one? Thank you in advance!_

* * *

Nothing held Steve's attention downstairs, so he went up to his bedroom. When he opened the door, he found Maria on the bed; she was reading a book. "Hey, Stevey. Have you read this book yet?"

The man moved towards the edge of the bed and sat down. "No."

Maria laid there fiddling with the book. "You know, its a very dirty book." She scooted closer to him. "Which... reminds me, I've been meaning to ask if we could consummate." As she ran her hands down his back, Steve shifted in his spot, uncomfortably.

He spoke in a hush tone, "Maria, as much as I would like to do this, I think that now is not the best time."

Maria stopped groping Steve's chest, a put-out look forming on her face. "What's the matter?" Her hands dropped to her lap, as the woman began to hang her head sadly.

Steve, not liking the sad-sap show Maria was putting on, began to respond, when, suddenly-! The sound of a door bell sounding off next door, made Steve shoot up from his bed and rush over to the window.

Outside, Thor was greeting Tia with open arms. The two could be seen groping each other, and when the intimate contact got too vulgar, Steve coughed awkwardly into the bend of his arm. In the middle of their 'saucy' activities, Thor looked up into Steve's window and made eye contact with him.

And, just like before, when their eyes met; Steve felt a crippling sense of fear.

Steve jumped away from the window, and steam rolled the woman standing behind him. Unbeknownst to Steve; Maria had stood up to embrace him from behind, just seconds before he got caught peeping; so, when he had turned around and dove away from the window, he ended up crashing into her, and knocking her to the floor.

"Ow! What the hell, Steve?" Maria cried out in pain, as she sat up and rubbed her throbbing head.

Steve was already down the hall, when she spoke. He ran into the bathroom, and slammed the door. Locking the door, to keep anyone out, Steve breathed heavily and leaned against the counter. He sank into a feeling of calm, and it lasted for a short while, until Maria came to the door and began banging on it like she was the police.

What was wrong with everyone in this neighborhood! Didn't they know how to knock!

"Steve! Steve, come out here! If you didn't want to do 'it', you should have told me!" Maria grabbed the doorknob and jiggled it, as she tried to get her boyfriend out of the water-closet.

Steve shook his head, before leaning against the door, "Trust me, Maria, if I didn't want to get under the covers with you, I would have told you a long time ago." The woman scoffed angrily at his words. "I just don't want to come out, because _he caught me_, Maria! _He caught me looking_! And, he looked pissed, too! I bet he's gonna try and come up here, so he can kill me!"

"This is friggin' ridiculous!" Maria tried the door one more time, before stepping away and crossing her arms, "Come out here, now, or else!"

"Or else, what!" Steve barked back, defiance heavy in his voice, even though he was already preparing to open the door.

Maria tapped her foot, "Or else... I go over to his house and ask if I can make their duo into a trio!"

Steve didn't exactly know what she was saying, but he could guess she was implying something crude, so the super-soldier opened the door, and stepped back into the hallway.

Maria began to thank Steve for his cooperation, but was interrupted, when he spoke first, "I think Thor might be evil..."

The brunette turned platinum-blonde rolled her eyes, "And, why is that?"

"Because..." Steve grabbed her hand, and led her back into his bedroom-more specifically, the window. With his free hand, the dirty-blonde haired man pointed out the window at Thor and Tia. "For starters-she's been over there for fifteen minutes, in those skimpy clothes, in the dead of night in Nevada, and he still hasn't invited her in. What kind of man does that?"

Maria shrugged, exhausted from Steve's wild behavior and speculating. "I dunno, a player? I mean, c'mon. He's hot, she's obviously a slut; they couldn't go five minutes without meeting."

Steve bristled, "She's not a slut; she's a stripper. There's a difference."

"Oh, really? Well, tell me what makes her not a slut, Mr. Smarty-pants. Is it her strong will, or her kind heart?" Maria folded her arms, looking the definition of cross, as she waited for Steve to answer her.

The super-soldier sighed, "She's a stripper; because she thought she had no other job options, and decided to take her clothes off for money to support herself. You're a slut; because you slept with my ex-best friend, because I wanted to wait a little longer to put out. See? There's a difference."

Maria floundered, so enraged, she couldn't put a single thought together. "Ugh...! I'm out of here!" She finally said, grabbing her bag from under the bed and stomping out of the room, leaving a trail of tears and curses behind her.

Steve frowned, as he watched her go, before plopping down in his desk chair and drifted into a bitter slumber.


	9. Hidden Panels

**Chapter eight: Hidden Panels**

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Some time later, a scream sounded from the house next door. It was loud enough to startle Steve awake; but, no one else, apparently. Thinking of about the safety of Tia, the man dialed 911.

Soon, red and blue lights shone through his bedroom window; this signaled to him that the police had arrived, and it was now save to stare out the window again. Steve did just that, and watched as the officers got out of their vehicle and walked casually to Thor's front door. No time later, the door was answered.

What astonished Steve was the fact that the police men seemed to gush at the sight of Thor. It was if the man was some Godly figure-like the god of Thunder himself-and, it wasn't long until Steve saw the officers bid the neighbor good night, before departing.

Steve sat back on his bed. He tried to think of another way to save Tia, but his mind told him that he was her only hope. Damn it, why did he always have to do everything! Just as he was formulating a plan, Steve heard the engine of Thor's pick up truck. Seems like the guy was leaving...

Steve decided that this was his best chance to save the young woman next door, so he retrieved his shield from under his bed, and exited his house and snuck across the yard to Thor's.

When he got there, Steve used his shield to break a window, and jumped inside soon after. In another universe, it would have taken Steve ages to find where Tia had been stashed, but the super-soldier had extraordinary hearing; all he had to do was listen out for the possible noises she could be making.

Straining to hear her, over the gas-powered generator that thrummed loudly in the backdrop, Steve thought he could hear the stripper whimpering somewhere upstairs. Drawing in a breath, the super-soldier almost choked on the heavy smell of diesel. Was there a leak in here? Why'd the place smell like a gas station!

Covering his face, and walking carefully behind his shield; Steve took no time in locating the general area from which Tia's simpering came from-Thor's bedroom, more specifically, the closet.

'What a really shitty hiding place!' Steve thought, as he crossed Thor's bedroom, in a few long strides, and yanked open the double doors. He expected to find, when he opened the doors, Tia on the floor; bound, gagged, and in tears, but 100% alive and non-vamp, but, of course, things don't always go as expected. Instead of finding Tia-Steve stumbled upon Thor's arguably expensive, name-brand clothing... and, that was it.

His and Barton's speculations of Thor being a vampire were confirmed, as he stared at a gaudy pair of gator-skin, Gucci slacks hanging up. There was no way a construction worker-or a carpenter, whatever the frick Thor said he did for a living-could afford something that expensive!

As Steve scanned the many articles of clothing, his hands brushing passed Mink coats and other pricey things, the super-soldier listened out, once more, for Tia's cries for help. She had sounded like she was in the closet, until Steve got near it-now, somehow, she sounded further away.

'What the hell... is there something behind this wall?'

As frustrated as he was becoming, Steve decided not to rip Thor's clothes from the shelf and punch a hole through the wall. That would be stupid and incredibly rude-Steve was raised with manners, and he was going to use them, thank you very much.

Putting on his 'serious\determined' face, Steve put his shield down on the floor by his feet-despite how heavy the vibranium super-frisbee was; it didn't make a sound, as it was placed down-and slipped his hand between a wall of silk shirts that were all the same cut and color, so that he could try and find a lose panel in the wall hidden behind the clothes.

As he tried the wall, Steve heard the roar of Thor's car's engine, as the vampire pulled back into the garage. Shit, shit, shit, shit! He was home! Steve almost hyperventilated at the thought of being caught. He had to act fast, or Thor would get him! He didn't want to end up like Phil, or Barton... Okay, never mind, Barton. It was Steve's fault that Clint bit the dust. At the funeral, Steve would remember to bring some fresh-but, dreadfully under watered and somewhat wilted-Carnations.

As he heard the engine die down, Steve prayed that the wall would finally give way-and miraculously, it did! Swearing in relief, the super-solider snatched his shield off the floor, before darting into the closet and through the secret passage within.

Magically, the closet door and secret passage-panel closed behind him, despite no action on his part to cover his tracks, so Steve was free to do whatever he pleased...which was good, because it meant that he could get back to finding Tia.

Looking away from the panel he had just stepped through, Steve found himself standing in a long, brightly-lit narrow hallway. The white walls matched the low, light-fixture covered ceiling, (why a vampire needed a light in his 'secret' room was a mystery to Steve) and the grey floors matched the multitude of doors that stretched down the corridor in a menacingly uniform way.

Steve steeled his nerves, as he walked quietly down the hallway; he remembered to keep an ear out for both Tia and the murderous-Thor. Clutching the leather handle-straps of his shield, the super-soldier walked towards one of the doors and peeked through the window carved into it. There was no one inside. Damn it, how long was he going to have to search? "Tia... where are you?" Whispering the best he could, Steve walked down the hall; peering into the windows, as he passed by them.

A muffled sob came from a door by the end of the hall, "Stevey! I'm in here! Help me, please...!" Tia cried aloud, as she began banging on the door in unadulterated fright.

Finally!

Steve thought, as he ran towards the door and bashed the window with his shield. Out of pure dumb luck, the sheet of glass popped out of the window-frame without even the slightest speck on it, and even dumber, was that Steve was able to catch it before it hit the floor.

Whew... He exhaled in relief, placing the glass onto the floor, so that he could get back to the task at hand. Rescuing his stripper neighbor. Reaching his hand up into the window, Steve managed to grab the doorknob from the inside. Just as he was about to turn it and unlock the door, he heard; from all the way down the hall, the wooden closet-panel being moved out of the way. Oh, no! Thor was coming!

Flailing his arms like he was set ablaze, Steve looked around for a hiding place-he knew that had to find somewhere, and quick, too; because Thor randomly got impatient, and kicked a large hole into the paneling!

Putting the glass window pane back into place, Steve and his trusty shield ran into one of the unlocked, unoccupied white-rooms. He got there in the nick of time, too, 'cause Thor had just put his heavy, muddy boots on the floor, when Steve clicked the door closed.

Literally throwing himself against the wall, Steve held his breath, as he waited and listened for Thor to do something. He didn't have to wait long, as Thor immediately went for the room that Tia was stowed away in, and yanked the door open with ease.

Steve glowered, as he looked through the little window from his crouch-position. The door wasn't even locked! He broke the window for no reason! Cursing to himself, the super-soldier almost lost track of the fact that this was neither the time or the place for his wandering mind-that is, until he watched Thor thread his thick fingers through Tia's bleach-blonde hair so that he could violently yank her head back.

The woman yelped, as the vampire exposed her neck, and almost called out for Steve to help her. Her mouth fell open, and she looked to him in the mirror, but just as she began to say his name, the man mouthed, "I'm sorry... but, you're on your own!" before he flashed her the bird and disappeared from sight.

Tia cried freely now, knowing that this was the end for her, and when Thor bit her finally, her body went all wiggly and limp.

The ethereal man drank from the deep punctures in Tia's neck, and at some point, the blood flowing from her wounds began gushing out like a sprinkler! Thor let out a hearty-laugh, before ripping off his shirt and rubbing the blood on his rippling muscles, like a model posing for a macabre Levi ad.

"Ugh, that's just nasty..." Steve murmured, as he turned away from the display with a disgusted expression on his face. "Who does that; rub blood on themselves? Lestat?" Pausing, the man pondered briefly to himself, 'who the hell is Lestat?'

That brief pondering turned into a full-out search of his memory, as Steve tried to recall just who this mysterious man was-and, in the time he scanned his thoughts, Thor bled Tia almost completely dry, before standing up and slurping the woman's blood off his sausage fingers. Smacking his lips, Thor sighed contentedly, and stalked out of the 'secret-corridor', altogether.

Steve waited a full two seconds, before clambering out of the room and to Tia's side. She looked extremely ill; her skin was sallow, her eyes (what little Steve could see of them, due to her puffy, purple-tinged eyelids being half-closed) were bloodshot and unfocused, her lips was blue... not to mention that she had two holes in her neck...that were bleeding profusely!

Steve face-palmed, before grabbing Tia by the shoulders and hauling the woman upright. "Are you okay?" She spit blood in his face, as she swore at him, in response to his earlier cruelty. Steve dropped her to the floor, again, before standing up and wiping his face off. "Fine. You're on your own, then."

Tia snorted, as if she hadn't heard that before. Rolling her head on her shoulders, the blonde rolled onto her back, so she look passed Steve, and gave the camera-crew her best pitiful expression. "Heya, guys... can you just kill me, and get it over with? I know we're supposed to run through this guy's house, and build the suspense, but... My neck is freakin' killing me, and I've got another audition in two hours, that I need to get cleaned up for."

Steve looked around for whomever Tia was talking to. He was absolutely bewildered. Just who was she talking to? It was just the two of them in here! More importantly, why would she want to die, and how did she know what was going to happen next. Reaching his hand out, and catching the woman's shoulder, the super-soldier looked into Tia's eyes, "What's going on?"

"I've got a fledging-career to look after, that's what." And suddenly, the platinum-blonde died; for non-explainable reasons, other than the bite on her neck-which, turned out not to be a bite at all; but, instead, was carefully applied makeup.

Steve jolted when the 'dead' Tia got up and walked out of the corridor, and into this weird void-like space; where she found her purse and car keys and said 'good-bye' to a bunch of people who looked to belong to a camera-crew.

Suddenly, Steve found himself to be on a set-more importantly, he found himself not be Steve (Rogers) Romanoff anymore. He was some guy named... Chris... and, this Chris-guy was waving at the departing Tia. "Bye, Rose! Good luck on the audition."

"What... the... f-" Steve started to say, as he slipped back into character, but was immediately interrupted by the notion that... shit... he needed to get out of Thor's house!

Standing up, the man and his shield took off much like Phil had done before him; but this time, the running looked cool and awe-inspiring.

As he exited into Thor's sleeping quarters. Steve hefted his shield upwards and tossed it through the vampire's bedroom window. He ran over to the opening and climbed out onto the roof. And with the grace of a house cat, Steve leapt off the roof and into the safety of his back yard.


	10. Drive

**A\N: **_We didn't even bother to spell-check this chapter. Someone's been busy with school, so... we've been falling behind on updates; hopefully, it doesn't show as much as I think._

_Thank you all for reading and reviewing, in advance!_

* * *

With definative evidence that his neighbor was indeed a vampire-and the heroic resolve to kill him and avenge Tia's death-Steve set out to find ways to slay Thor and all his supernatural might!

There were many information outlets for Steve to chose from, when it got down to him researching ways to run Thor through, but instead of visiting the library and checking out one of Bram Stoker's famous novels, or simply Googling _'how to kill a vampire'_; Steve decided to be difficult-he decided that he was going to seek out and beg for the assistance of Las Vegas' most well-known vampire-hunter\stage-magician...!

After class, that day, Steve arrived back home to a quiet house and found Natasha's purse on the counter. The super-soldier was careful not to make too much noise, as he rifled through the redhead's purse. He was looking for her keys, and as Steve searched the bag-and then, the entirety of the livingroom-the bronze-haired man heard whispers and zippers upstairs. _Ew... Natasha was entertaining 'guests', again... Why did he have to have super-hearing!_

Covering his ears, as he attempted to block out the loud, slurping sounds and muffled grunts coming from upstairs, Steve stumbled over a protrusion in the carpet.

Landing onto the floor with a BOOM! Steve thought for sure that he would be caught-but, as he laid there on the floor, he heard that the sounds upstairs had yet to stop; in fact, they intensified... wow, it was as if he didn't make a sound at all.

_Whatever they were doing up there, they couldn't be bothered to stop!_

Picking himself up, Steve ripped up the carpet to see what he tripped over-and lo and behold, it was the keys! _Why were they there? _The bed started creaking upstairs; Steve shuddered... never mind, he didn't want to know. He needed to get out of here.

Standing up, Steve bolted for the garage and jumped over the hood of the car; Dukes of Hazard-style. The car groaned and buckled under Steve's weight, but he ignored it, as he landed on the Driver's side and yanked the door open. Clambering inside, Steve slammed the door shut and settled into the carseat.

The first thing he noticed, was that the car was a tight fit-with a little adjusting, though, he was able to procure himself some wiggle-room-and the second thing, was that... well, shit, he didn't know how to drive a car; and Natasha just had to own a smart-hybrid car, too!

Staring at the new-fangled technology, Steve scratched his chin, before hitting a silver-button that sat in the spot of the ignition and read in big bright words, "START."

The engine purred, as it sprang to life. All the lights clicked on, at once; an obviously animatronic voice started talking about something called, '_On-Star_' and GPS; jets of water and cleaning solution started spraying the windshield, before wipers started with a '_bzzz_!' and began swiping it away. In short-it was all overwhelming to Steve.

The super-soldier sputtered, as he started pressing random buttons and flicking random switches. Amazingly, he shut off everything but the windshield wipers-they eventually went off, on their own-with his uneducated actions. Sighing, Steve looked around the car for something familiar... aha! There was the gear shift!

Grasping it, Steve carefully shifted the stick, until it rested in the 'D' slot. Taking a deep breath, Steve gripped the steeringwheel tightly in his hands, and gently applied his foot to the acceleration.

The car slowly started rolling forward; and startled by the movement, the super-soldier was quick to take his foot off the pedal. The car didn't stop rolling, and so Steve slammed his foot on the brake-right in time, too, because he almost crashed into the house!

"Okay, so the 'D' stands for drive. So I'm guessing the 'R' is for reverse, then?" Talking to himself, Steve tried to figure the car out.

Looking through the rear-view mirror, and then turning around, Steve looked at the garage door and frowned. He forgot to open it, shit... didn't Natasha have something in here to open it automatically? In fact, she did.

It was a tiny, black remote that had two red buttons on it, 'Up' and 'Down', and it was hidden away in the glove compartment. Poor Steve only found it, because he was trying to locate a User's Manual for On-Star; he was going to need Emergency Services, if driving a car was harder than it looked in the movies.

With the garage door opened, Steve put the car in Reverse and put his foot on the accelerator. Turning around, the super-soldier watched as the car drifted backwards until it rolled out onto the street-luckily, no one was driving behind him, or else there would have been an accident!

Carefully, Steve turned around and put the brakes on, before putting the car in Drive again, and turning the steeringwheel to the right until the wheels were facing the direction he wanted to go.

Praying that he wouldn't die in a firey-metal wreckage, Steve eased his foot down on the gas, once again, and kept his hands glued to the wheel. Fortunately, no small children or animals came scurrying in front of the car, and Steve was able to drive (albeit slowly) out of the neighborhood.

Hopefully, in a short time, he could get the hang of driving-because, there was no way he would survive on the open-road, if he didn't!


	11. Master Vampire Slayer

**Chapter ten: Master Vampire Slayer**

* * *

A little over 40 minutes later, Steve found himself on the Las Vegas strip. The man searched for a parking space, because the car was running out of fuel and he didn't trust himself to drive throughout the city.

After attempting to park the car on the street, Steve decided to abandon the car in an empty lot by a Burger King. He locked the doors and set off on foot.

Soon, he arrived at the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino, which wasn't too far from the car. The man entered the building, but stopped in the lobby. Since he didn't know the layout, Steve couldn't locate the amphitheater.

Not wanting to waste time, searching around, Steve did what any tourist would do, and followed the advertisement posters; which, lead him to a pair of closed doors. Judging from the noises inside, Steve could tell that they were rehearsing for tonight's show.

Knowing that he couldn't just walk into the room. Steve made his way back to the front of the lobby and found a news stand. He took a newspaper and then wandered down one of the hallways and found a maintenance room. He searched the small area and found a roll of duct tape.

With a little creativity, Steve had taped the Las Vegas Sun logo onto his shirt. Even though he looked like an idiot with duct tape on his shirt, the man felt a little confident as he made his way back to the theater. He pushed open the doors and proceeded to the front row seats.

What he saw was on stage was a generic vampire production.

A woman laid in a large, wooden bed. She was dressed in a white, silky night gown. A rose shaped eye patch concealed her left eye. She was surrounded by unnaturally pale women in leather outfits. They appeared to be vampires. One of the three women, bit the dark skinned woman on the bed. Her bald head swayed back and forth as she slowly raised off the bed, arms spread apart as if she were nailed to a cross. She stilled herself before opening her eyes to reveal golden irises.

With heavily lashed eyes, the woman scanned the room when her eyes landed on a dark-haired man in front of her. She began to hiss loudly.

Seeing the woman he loved transformed into a vampire, the man raised his ghostly white hands and shouted some nonsense to the woman.

As he spoke, the guy said something that triggered the pyrotechnics. And in an instant, a bright light erupted in front of the woman's face. An agonizing scream could be heard from the stage, as the surrounding area filled with an unusual amount of smoke, which meant that something had malfunctioned.

Seeing this, the thin, dark-haired man shouted for everything to stop. Soon all activity halted on stage and the makeup crew descended onto the set. "What the hell is going on?" He shouted hysterically. "We've been doing this pathetic show for three years man, THREE YEARS!" The man began to pace across the stage. "And you imbeciles can't get this part right." The man focused all of his anger towards the pyrotechnic positioned by the 7th row. "Must I do everything myself!"

Within seconds, the smoke cleared from the stage to reveal a team of paramedics treating a man wearing the exact same outfit as the woman had worn.

Steve took this opportunity to get the man's attention. "Mister Loki Laufeyson, may I ask you to say a few words for my blog?" Loki spun around, expecting to see another grotesque blogger. But instead, what he saw was a very large, very handsome muscular man in tight clothing. Did he forget to mention the frosted tips in the taller guy's hair?

"Uh, sure." The thin man said anything so that he can put some distance between himself and the larger guy. He side stepped Steve and took big steps towards the door. "Meet me at my room in 5 minutes." Loki gave Steve the room number and exited the theater.


	12. Penthouse

**Chapter eleven: Penthouse**

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After waiting for what seemed like an eternity, the security guard gave Steve the okay to head up stairs. Steve made his way to the elevator and pressed the last button on the panel that lead to the penthouse on the top floor. Surprisingly, the ride to the top floor was uneventful; and so in time that Steve waited, he reached into his pocket and fished out his phone-after a few moments of playing Fruit Ninja, the super-soldier went onto a few choice sites and put in an order for some high-quality, anti-vampire paraphernalia.

As soon as the doors opened, the man stepped out, walked through the spacious mini-museum, and went to the door on the far side of the atrium. He rang the door bell a few times, before stepping back to wait. Steve didn't have to wait long because, Loki could be heard approaching the door. He wondered how other man knew that he had arrived.

The dark haired man yanked the doors open and allowed the super-soldier to come inside. He watched as Steve ventured towards his living room, eyes roaming the super soldier's body. Loki cleared his throat before speaking. "So, what type of input are you looking for?"

Steve turned back to Loki, not sure of what to say. Oh well, I'll just have to wing it. "I am interested in your vampire-hunter background."

Loki walked over to his egg shaped chair and plopped down on the plush seat. "I could have guessed from a thousand miles. Be more specific." As Steve began to explain his reason for showing up, Loki gapped his legs open and his hand went down south for the pole. He began to grope and fondle the crotch-region of his leather pants.

Steve had a difficult time not looking; the magician kept grunting and squirming, and it made the super-soldier extremely uncomfortable.

"Sir, I need to know how to kill a vampire." Steve said loudly, in hopes that Loki would stop and pay attention. The other man continued to shift in his seat. "Leather, doesn't breathe, you know...Uh, these fucking rashes are killing me!" A sickening sound of liquid sloshing around could be heard from the man's pants. Loki stood up and walked towards his bar area.

Steve shifted in his seat and shouted. "I am serious, I have a vampire living next door to me. His name is Thor and..."

Loki ducked behind the counter and pulled his pants off. The sound of fluid splashing onto the marble flooring was sickening. "Hah, you know a vampire named Thor?" The man stood up with a jug of bourbon in his hand, he leaned against the counter. Steve stood up to approach the man, but thought otherwise. "Yes, and he has threatened my girl and Maria. I just need a way to rid of him."

Loki stepped from behind the counter to reveal milky white legs, but what stood out was the painfully inflamed looking rash on his inner thighs that appeared to extend well beyond the limits of his briefs. Steve could have sworn that a bit of the rash was peeking past the waist band of Loki's underwear. "You're sounding coocoo, that's what I think." The dark hair man said as he scratched his stomach and took a big gulp of his liquor. "Vampires don't exist, you probably have a rapist neighbor...or something."

"But sir, I have proof that he isn't human." The man fished into his shirt and pulled out a folded piece of paper. With proof in hand, Steve closed the distance between the pair and shoved the Photos into Loki's face. What Loki saw infuriated him, pictures taken with a camera that predates 2004? There was no way for him to look at them properly without his bi-focal glasses. Does this man know that he lost his last pair? Loki violently swatted Steve's hand down. "GET OUT!"

Steve didn't know what happened, at first Loki seemed like he was listening and now he's acting as if Steve were a tax collector.

Loki threw his bottle at Steve hoping that would scare him away. But that only served to anger the super-soldier. The dark haired man backed away from Steve and moved towards his bar. He reached his hand under the counter fishing for his desert eagle as Steve approached him with a quickness.

The muscular guy gripped Loki's arm and pulled him away from the bar. He tossed the dark haired man on the floor. "Tell me what I need to know, or I swear to god that the least of your worries will be that syphilis problem."

Loki remained still in his spot, not wanting to risk upsetting the angry brunette with frosted tips. "Have you tried garlic or stakes. I hear they're all the rage these days"

Steve smacked the man on the ground. He raised his hand in a threating manner, hoping that he wouldn't have to use it again. "Stop playing with me and tell me something I don't know."

Loki held his face in discomfort. "I know that tanning beds and..." Before the next words could leave his mouth, Steve began to shake the hell out of Loki.

Not wanting to die, Loki slipped his hand under his end table adjacent to the bar and began spraying the whole bottle of mace in Steve's face. The larger man covered his face in pain; trying to prevent the mace from reaching his eyes. While Steve was distracted, Loki rolled towards his bar area and pressed a red button on the wall that signaled for security. He then dashed off to his panic room, which was located somewhere in the penthouse.

Trying to recover from the pain, Steve searched the room for that wack ass vampire-slayer. When he couldn't find him any where, Steve did what any person in this situation would do. He ran! Ran until he couldn't run anymore. And when he couldn't do that, he raised his head to see that he arrived at his car. What he saw was a ticket on the windshield. Damn...


	13. Back home

**Chapter twelve: Back Home**

* * *

Steve felt the burning sting of Loki's rejection in his puffy, reddening face, the entire drive back home to his house; but, could hardly be bothered to do more than think about the pain and moderate-swelling, as his mind was dominated by more pressing thoughts. With or without Loki's help; the super-soldier was going to have to kill Thor-or else, the vampire would feed upon everyone he knew and loved... _and Maria._

_Shit, he really did have to do everything... _

As Steve pulled up at the curb in front of his driveway, the man checked his phone to see how far along his order of Stakes and Crosses was.

Surprisingly, the package-tracker APP-that he downloaded sometime off-camera-said that his package was at his house, _right now_. "Hmm... that was quick. I guess they don't call it overnight shipping for nothing." As he clambered out of the car, with his eyes glued to the pristine LCD screen, Steve almost knocked down the UPS delivery-man.

"Hey, watch it! _Jerk_..." The man muttered, pushing Steve as he walked back to his delivery-truck. Steve didn't budge or sway, despite the man's harsh shove, and watched him go. "Good evening to you, too." Steve grumbled; shrugging as he locked the car with a click of a button, and stalked up his driveway.

Letting himself into his house, Steve found Natasha and Maria sitting at the kitchen-table. Neither woman would speak or make eye-contact with each other; so when Steve walked in, they immediately and literally jumped on him. "Where have you been! You missed school! I've been calling you, non-stop, for hours!" Maria rambled, gripping onto Steve's shirt, as she hung from his arm like an ivy-vine.

Natasha grumbled, before catching Maria by her artificial blonde hair and snatching her away from Steve. Maria collasped to the ground uttering something about how abusive her boyfriend and his adoptive-mother were.

"Listen here, you-" The redhead started swearing like an enraged sailor, shipwrecked on a island of frisky, male-prostitutes. "Social Services called earlier, asking for your dumbass-you weren't here, and I had no idea where you were! What the hell, Steve!"

Steve raised his eyebrow, when Natasha mimicked Maria's earlier actions and clung to his arm. "So... what? Are you in trouble or something..."

Natasha backhanded Steve; vexed beyond belief by his stupidity. "So! I panicked and told them that you were at Thor's house, and now they're coming over here, tomorrow, to investigate! I've got no time to make this place presentable, over-night!"

"Why would you say that I was at Thor's house? I would never go to that creep's place!" Steve hollered, his voice echoing out of the open windows.

Maria scoffed, "Thor's not a creep, Steve." and Natasha actually agreed with her. The two women were either incredibly disagreeable by nature, or extremely ignorant to the fact that even if he wasn't a vampire; Thor still exuded some pretty bizarre behavior... like licking hands.

Steve threw his arms up, not wishing to get in a fight with either one of them about the vampire. "Never mind, I'm going to my room! You put the package in my room, right, m-_Natasha?_"

The ex-spy nodded slowly, her eyes narrowing into thin, angry slits, "Yeah, I did. What the hell did you order, anyways? Bricks? That box was friggin' heavy."

"Something like that."


	14. Shit just got real!

**Chapter thirteen: Shit just got real!**

* * *

Steve ripped the tape off the box with ease, and poured the contents onto the floor. Sharpened stakes, ornate crosses and flasks filled to the brim with holy water spilled onto the carpet, and the super-soldier found himself beaming like kid at Christmas time.

Grabbing a handful of crosses and a handful of twine, Steve made his way to his window and started hanging the holy symbols from the draperies. As he did so, Tony and Bruce watched him from the billionare's pricey sportscar.

"He's turning into a friggin' loon!" Tony tsk'ed, as he raised his forearm to eye-level and grinned at the copious amount of cocaine that rested upon his skin.

Bruce nodded in agreement; his mouth a little too preoccupied with the crack-pipe he was trying so hard to light with the busted lighter Natasha gave them a short while back. Ah... Ms. Romanoff; always encouraging the youth to do dangerous things. Sure, Bruce wasn't apart of 'the youth'; and should have known better not to do drugs in broad daylight, but...never mind that.

As the two of them got high and laughed at Steve's new decorations, they were completely unaware of Thor approaching their vehicile, until the vampire tapped on the glass; gesturing for them to roll the window down.

Tony jumped half-way out of his skin, and shook the fine, white powder off his arm. Dusting it off his clothes and wiping it off his trimmed moustache, Tony sniffed and looked over to Bruce.

The other man was unfazed by Thor's presence; in fact, the Hulk didn't even seem to be fully-aware. Tony smacked him and swatted the pipe out of his hand. "Shit, man! I'm still on probation and your ass is about to get us caught!"

Bruce chortled, as he wiped some drool off his face, "He's not the Fuzz... it's just that dude from across the street." Smiling blissfully, the scientist reached over Tony's lap and rolled the window down. "Hey, man. How's it going?"

And that was the last thing Bruce Banner ever said to anyone; because not a moment later, Thor pulled him out of the window and ripped his head off with his sharp, supernatural teeth!

Tony startled at the sight of his friend being murdered, tried to get out of the passenger's door. As the playboy climbed over the seat and reached for the door-handle, Thor jumped-with unheard of agility-into the car through the open window and onto Tony's back.

The man screamed, as the vampire dug his talon-like nails into his shoulders and bit his neck.

As this vicious attack went on, everyone in the neighborhood was completely oblivious-even Steve, despite the fact that he was still in front of his window, hanging up the crosses.

"That should do it." The super-soldier said, patting himself on the shoulder, as he admired his handiwork with admiration in his eyes. Around forty to forty-five crosses were dangling across the window from thick twine threads; which themselves, smelled heavily of garlic and stale water.

Natasha was absolutely floored to see all of the religious fixtures that soon embellished every wall; every end-table; every chair or stool; and every single nook and every cranny of her home, in general.

"Okay, you know what... fuuUUuh-" Natasha tried her hardest to drop the mighty 'F'-bomb, but the censor would not allow it. Seething, the ex-spy ran her fingers through her curly, flaming-red hair, before glaring at Steve and continuing her dialog: "You know what, Steve. I'm done. I'm done with this whole arrangement. I know I through all the torturous motions and adopted you-but, I'm friggin' tired of this... tired of you!" She pointed accusingly at him, for added effect.

Steve, not knowing where the redhead was going, readied himself for a fight. The last time she yelled at him like this, she beat him with a wired-hanger. "Where are you going with this?" The super-soldier asked carefully, as he continued to brace himself.

Natasha crossed her arms, "Tomorrow; when the CPS agent shows up, I'm sending you, her, and all your shit to the curb."

Steve went from confused to shocked, as his handsome face betrayed his emotions so vividly. He wasn't surprised that Natasha was threatening to throw him out; he was surprised that she hadn't tried to choke him out, yet. "That's it?... I'm fine with that. But, can it wait until after I kill Thor?"

Natasha's annoyed expression fell away completely, only to be replaced with that of shock and anger. "You've got to be kidding me! You're going to _kill_ our neighbor? Is this why you bought all that crap-" She pointed to a clove of garlic resting innocently on the table by the door. "-you think Thor's a vampire!"

"Of course, I do. Damn it, are you deaf?" Steve retorted.

Outside, the screaming from the pair could be heard by passerbys. Yet it didn't deter Thor in the least. He took it as a means to get into the house and tear that so-called family apart.

Thor walked up to the front door and gave a couple of hardy knocks. "Lady Natasha, I request that you do something with your _boy. _Last night, he broke into my house and put his grimey hands on everything!"

Maria looked between the front door and Steve. "So you were at his house. Oooh, you had the nerve to lie to me!" Steve raised his hands, signaling Natasha to lower her voice. "He kidnapped a friend, I had to save her."

Natasha crossed her arms. "Is _'saving a friend' _code-name for sleeping with the neighbor?" She said harshly at him, enraged at the thought of Steve entering Thor's house instead of herself.

Thor didn't like the whispering one bit, because even with his enhanced hearing, the man could only make out the sounds of heavy breathing. "Madam, I suggest that we discuss this matter in private, or I will have to contact the authorities." His voice boomed like thunder.

Steve looked toward Natasha, not sure where her mind was. The woman could sale him out at any moment, so the man readied himself, just incase he had to silence the red head from saying anything that would allow that vampire inside.

Natasha scoffed at his actions. "Call the cops, better yet; tell them that Steve attacked you and stole some stuff!" She shouted.

Outside, Thor could sense that the woman was approaching the door. And as this was transpiring, Thor attempted to hide his excitement, yet he was failing horribly. The vampire giggled giddily behind his large masculine hands and did a little jig on the porch.

As he turned around to adjust some _things_, Thor hadn't realize that Steve closed the distanced between Natasha and the door. "Matter of fact, come i-" Suddenly, Natasha's speech was abruptly cut off, as Steve rammed her into the wooden door; causing the paneling to splinter.

Thor jumped back due to the unexpected noise. "Lady Natasha?" When he didn't receive a response, Thor stepped off the pathway to peek through the window. What greeted him was the face of Steve. On the other side of the glass, Steve gave his neighbor the most menacing face he could muster.

Eventually, the super-soldier broke the silence. "Take your creepy ass back home. There is nothing here for you."

"Haha, petty human. That's where you're wrong. If you continue to disallow me entrance to your dwelling, I shall force myself inside and take what I came here for." Thor smirked, and backed away from the house altogether. He crossed the Romanoff's yard and onto his own. Soon, he disappeared in his garage.

Steve wasn't sure of what the guy was doing, but it didn't take him long to figure it out!

Thor emerged from the garage, wielding a large hammer. It looked like something out of legends; high-polished and ancient. _All the man needs is a chisel and he is ready to sculpt. _Steve joked with himself, although it didn't do much for the situation. Noticing that neighbor was on the move, Steve walked through the house to keep up with Thor, as he rounded the house and entered the back yard.

From there, Thor positioned himself near the back door. He then raised his weapon high in the air-as he did so, the very heavens above seemed to churn; the sky darkened with pregnant storm clouds and lightning struck at a rapid pace. Feeling as though he'd held the pose long enough, the blonde struck the earth with a great deal of strength. The force from the impact caused a noticeable amount of damage to the foundation of the house.

A large portion of the kitchen sunk a foot into the ground. All sorts of decorations rained down from the walls; a few pieces even struck Maria-who was napping at the kitchen table. Steve stumbled forward, luckily he caught his balance. _Shit, this guy is planning to bring the house down!_

As Thor continued his assault on the foundation, Steve instructed Maria to grab some stakes and meet him on the front lawn. Doing as she was told, the woman picked up a few of the lethal pegs, that had fallen on the floor, and headed for the living room.

As she passed through the area, she noticed the door was wide open; but, somehow, that didn't freak her out. It was the heavily damaged wood that scared her. Did Thor try to break in? She thought to herself, as she ran towards the car.

Thanks to the street light, Maria could make out Steve's form. But he seemed to be hunched over someone. When she reached the car, she saw that Steve was securing the seat belt for his unconsious adopted-mother.

Not wanting to ask questions, Maria hopped into the car and watched as Steve assumed the role as driver. Briefly, the woman worried if Steve could even drive, in the first place-perish the thought, Steve put the car in reverse and pulled away from the curb, before he slammed on the accelerator and the car jerked violently as the spedomitor jumped to 80 within a couple of seconds.

They flew down the street, and Maria tried to relax in her seat; but, found that she could not. Why not? Because something was nagging her conscious. _Why hadn't Thor persued them, he could have caught the lot of them in a flash... what was he planning?_

Steve was thinking the same thing as he turned the corner and traveled down the road that lead out of the neigborhood.


	15. Dear Mother

**Chapter fourteen: Dear Mother**

* * *

As the neighborhood fell away and was then replaced with the almost picturesque moonlit desert-landscape, Steve leaned back in his seat and tried to relax. They would be fine, as long as they put as much distance between them and Thor as possible. Looking up at the rearview mirror, and then daring to glance over his shoulder and behind Maria's head, Steve sighed a little bit. He didn't see headlights; just the black top stretching and winding back forever-Thor hadn't followed. Thank the Lord!

"That was close," Steve sighed, straightening in his seat and looking ahead at the road. "Are you alright, Maria?" He glanced back at the mirror to observe his girlfriend's face.

The woman breathed deeply through her mouth, before tucking a stray strand of artificial-blonde hair behind her ear. "Y-Yeah, I think I'm alright. Just a few scrapes and bruises." Maria dusted a few errant pieces of wood off her clothes, and went on to inspect herself further.

Steve moved his gaze from the natural-brunette to Natasha. She was starting to rouse from her state of unconsciousness. Her blue eyes fluttered open, and it only took a moment for the redhead to snap back into the real world. "STEVE! YOU ASSHOLE!"

Maria only had a second to process what was happening, before she found herself being thrown against the window and Natasha was lunging to the front seat to presumably kill Steve. The woman hissed, as her cheek throbbed from the impact, but ignored the pain as the car jerked violently to the side and swerved into the oncoming lane.

Shrieking, as she saw the flash of headlights shine through Natasha's splayed limbs, as she viciously attacked Steve, as the super-soldier tried to drive and defend himself, at the same time, Maria secured herself in her seatbelt, before grabbing the ex-spy and attempting to reel her back. "Ms. Romanoff!" She screamed again, as she wrapped her arms around Natasha's mid-section and pulled with all her strength!

It took Steve elbowing the redhead to get her to finally fall back into the bench-chair behind her; with her out the way, Steve looked back to the road-and by then, it was too late! The approaching car slammed into theirs' going at full speed!

Everything went in slo-mo, as the two cars collided harshly, and the poor occupants inside were jostled violently. Maria's overtaxed seatbelt held her tightly in place, and when her body tried to yield to the force the harness dug tighter into her body and squeezed the air of her lungs.

Steve lurched forward and hit his head on the steering wheel with a choked out groan of pain. Luckily, he was wearing his seatbelt; so a concussion and a gushing, bloody gash on his forehead was the only thing he received from the accident.

Unfortunately, Natasha; having been unsecured at the time of the crash, launched forward from her seat and out of the windshield! The glass shattered loudly and scraped Steve's exposed face as it rained down. The super-soldier lifted his hand to shield his face, and gasped when he looked up and saw Natasha's legs in his face.

She was laid out across the hood, and while Steve was no doctor; she looked to be dead. The super-soldier's eyes prickled with tears; but, Steve knew that he wasn't in the least bit sorrowful. He swallowed guiltily, before undoing his seatbelt and opening his car door. A first, it wouldn't budge, and so he was forced to break the door off.

Falling out of the car, Steve's vision swam and his stomach churned. The onset of vertigo was unwelcomed, to say the least, and Steve threw up as he was swept up in the phantasmal of colors that danced in front of his eyes.

Maria's door opened and the woman fell out onto the ground as well. She swore, as her torso hit the pavement, but her legs pretty much stayed in the car. Pulling herself away from the totaled vehicle, she looked over to Steve. "Are you okay?" Licking her lip and grunting, when she realized the flesh was split opened and bled; Maria spat out the crimson she collected in her mouth and crawled over to her boyfriend. "Steve..." She reached out a hand, and Steve found himself crawling into her arms.

The couple sat together on the street, injured and dizzy, in the middle of a car accident-scene for a short while, as they collected their composure. Steve was the first to break the silence that settled over them like the volcanic ash on the city of Pompeii. "-You and Natasha didn't believe me, when I said Thor was evil."

Maria didn't respond-didn't speak, as she looked up at the car they collided with and watched the obviously-injured driver climb over the center-console in his car and escape from his car VIA the passenger's door.

The man was bleeding profusely from his head injury and was talking gibberish, as he stumbled over to the two of them. As he stood over Steve and Maria, the man touched the large laceration that spanned from one side of his hairline to the other, and was immediately brought back to the present. "Holy shit... you guys hit me! What were you doing in my lane?" He started fussing.

Steve tore himself from Maria's grip and rose from the ground. "Look, we're sorry." His apology seemed to infuriate the man further; his fussing turned to cussing, and Steve was blushing like a nun at the type of language the injured driver used.

Maria pulled herself off the ground and leaned against Natasha's hybrid-car. She felt too weak to stand on her own. Breathing hard, the woman looked away from the bickering duo, and up towards the sky. She didn't remember it being this cloudy, when they set out earlier. What the hell?

As she stared up at the night sky, Maria gasped aloud, as heavy, inky-black storm-clouds filled in every bit of sky they could and swirled with deadly velocity. Lightning flashed and a magnificent bolt of silver streaked across the melancholic atmosphere. The loud crackle that accompanied the bolt sounded like a whip being cracked in a dark, silent room and it made the woman jump out of her skin!

When the thunder rolled in soon after, deafeningly loud and promising menacing things, the injured driver interrupted himself and looked up. "Ah, that's just great! It's going to rain!" holding his head, as it began to throb painfully, the man sat down. "This is just perfect! Can it get any worse?"

It could actually.

Another bolt of lightning struck, but this time it made contact with the ground, five feet in front of the injured group. The three people noticed that a man appeared an instant after the lightning strike. Steve and Maria gasped when they recognized the man as Thor!

The duo yelled for the injured man to run as they piled back into their vehicle. Not surprisingly, the car wouldn't start. It seems that the head on collision had damaged the engine beyond repair.

Thor stood tall; surveying the area as he gripped his hammer firmly. His eyes trained on the totaled vehicle in front of him. The movement inside told him that the high-schoolers were desperately searching for something.

He decided that he wanted a little appetizer before the main course, so he approached the injured man standing behind his wrecked car; though, he did so in slow manner, so that the wind could gently blow through his hair.

Hearing the foot steps, Maria looked up to see Thor descending on his next victim-who didn't put up much of a fight. The two could hear the man let out a shrill before falling silent.

Maria shook Steve, as he frantically searched the glove compartment. "Steve, we need to go. We won't survive in a fight against this freak." Knowing that Maria was right, Steve handed her a weapon that he found on the floor. The two then emerged from the totaled vehicle with stakes.

The noise of the car doors alerted Thor of their presence. He dropped the lifeless man. "Well, well, well. You decided to make an appearance." The man wiped some blood off his face, then licked his hand seductively-all the while, his eyes never left the trembling couple. "Oooh, I see your mother has passed on." The man pointed to Natasha's motionless form, as a smile crept onto his handsome face. "You wouldn't mind if I took a sip?" His face took on a more devilish appeal, as he advanced on the fallen ex-spy.

Steve stood in silence, as Thor began to approach his deceased adopted-mother. He grabbed for her wrist and lifted it towards his mouth. The man made sure to hold eye contact, as he licked the glass with even intensity to wriggle it free from the wounds in her sallow hand. "Mmm, so dirty." He spat out the shards.

Having enough with this situation, Steve charged the vampire. With all of his strength, the man tackled Thor to the ground. This only served to amuse the vampire. "Oh, young Steven-what a naughty boy you are..." Grinning, the blonde flipped them over, so that he was looming dangerously over Steve's supine form. Unfortunately, Thor did not see the weapon that the super-soldier wielded.

With stake in hand, Steve stabbed the man multiple times. In his blind rage, Steve's strikes missed the vampires heart. Blood sprayed from the gaping wounds on his chest and onto the super-soldier's clothing and face. Soon enough, Steve was soaked in the red liquid; like Carrie at Prom.

Sputtering and coughing on Thor's blood, Steve scrambled from under vampire's heavy, motionless body and scampered to his awestruck-girlfriend. "Come on, I think the other car might work!" The duo piled into the vehicle; this time Maria took the wheel. Surprisingly, it started it up and they rushed down the road.


	16. Falling Victim

**A/N:** _There is exactly three chapters and an epilogue left in the series. I want to release the last couple of chapters in a few days and during this time, I will get the next series going._

_Stay tuned!_

**Chapter fifteen: Falling Victim**

* * *

Some time later that night, the two made a stop at a Burger King-don't worry, they were cleaned up; Steve couldn't walk into a restaurant covered in vampire plasma.

Steve sat quickly at a table, slowly eating his cheese burger as he looked out the window. The sky overhead was black like charcoal, speckled with tiny silver stars, and completely devoid of clouds; that was a good sign. It meant that that creep wasn't about to friggin' teleport in here and kill them!

Maria stared at her boyfriend, as she propped her elbows onto the table and threaded her fingers together. Rested her head in the cradle of her hands, the woman made no move to touch her food. She didn't like kids-meals; even before this incident, so it's not like it mattered.

As they sat there in suffocating silence, the sounds of Steve's ring tone erupted from the man's back pocket. The music startled the two. Steve shifted around on the seat, so that he could reach and retrieve the phone from his pocket. Bringing the mobile to his ear, Steve answered, "Hello?" and was immediately greeted by a doctor with a stern voice. "Sir, your mother was involved in a car crash. She is currently listed in critical condition." Steve listened to the doctor with guilt heavy in his heart, as he knew the circumstances surrounding the 'accident'.

"Where is she-which hospital?" Maria asked quietly, as she listened in on the conversation. Steve shrugged, and parroted the question to the doctor, and well enough, he received directions to the hospital.

Soon the couple arrived at the hospital. It didn't do them any good, showing up. The doctors and nurses shooed them away, every time they attempted to visit Natasha; they said she probably wouldn't last the night.

Steve threw himself into one of the chairs in the hallway and clenched his hands into tight, angry fists. "This is my fault, Maria... I should have just killed Thor, when I had the chance. I was in his house, for cryin' out loud! I could have burned it to the ground!" Burying his face into his hands dramatically, Steve trembled with rage.

The fury so strong it was almost palpable-the nurses and attendants walking the halls ducked into the many doors that lined the corridor, just to get out of the same area as the super-soldier. The last time they had a really, really angry patient in their midst, their Brooklyn hospital was destroyed!

Maria took a seat beside Steve, and put her hand on his shoulder. "Steve... don't blame yourself-I mean, yeah, it is your fault-" The super-soldier shrugged her hand off and grunted. Maria pursed her lips, before trying a different tactic; "-I'm sure, Natasha's gonna be fine. Until then, we've got to do something about Thor."

The super-soldier jumped; remembering the vampire and the very real threat that he still posed. Shit, what if he came to the hospital looking for them? Natasha wouldn't be safe, so long as he and Maria were here.

Bolting upright, Steve looked over at Maria; his blue eyes twinkling with an idea. "Have you ever met Loki Laufeyson?" The woman shook her head, her own eyes widening. "Today's your lucky day, then... we're going to go see him."

Loki was playing with his paddle-ball, when the double doors to his penthouse were thrown open and walking in were two snotty high-schoolers; one he recognized to be Steve.

Jumping up from his chair, the vampire-hunter dropped his toy and grabbed an ornate staff hidden under his chair. Pointing it at the duo, the raven-haired man hissed, "You've got two minutes to turn around and go back from whence you came!"

Steve scoffed and rolled his eyes, before picking up a magazine that sat on the end table by the doors and fixing it into a cone. With skill reserved for specially trained assassin's and super-surgeons, the super-soldier threw the magazine. It sliced through the air so fast, that Maria could hardly see it with her naked eye. Loki wondered what the hell was happening, until the magazine hit him square in the forehead.

Loki fell completely limp onto the floor, his staff dropping to the ground and rolling under the couch just for shits and giggles. Stupid inanimate objects with minds of their own!

"Uh, you troll!" Loki shrieked as he lay in pain. Steve and Maria moved towards the incapacitated man. "Listen here, we're sick of running. Tell us how to kill a vampire" Steve gripped the dark haired man's arms and forced him into an up-right position. "Thor is after us and we have no where to turn."

Afraid of the larger man, Loki wiggled out of Steve's grasp. "What makes you think that I'll help you?" The dark haired slowly inched away from the duo.

Steve gritted his teeth with growing frustration. "Were you not just listening! We're being chased!"

Loki stared at the two. His mind was going through several possible outcomes for the upcoming situation. "How could you dunces bring that beast to my place of residence!" Loki shot up from his spot and bolted for his panic room. As he ran through his living room and past his bar area, the phone on the counter began to ring.

Loki stopped and motioned for Maria to answer it, then he set off to his panic room. As Maria answered the phone, the door to the panic room clicked close. "Package for mister Laufeyson." She heard from the security guard. Maria scanned the walls and located a surveillance camera and shouted loudly. "Mister Loki, you have a delivery."

From inside the panic room, Loki sat near his security monitors. One hand continuously pressed a red button that alerted the authorities and the other hand went for the microphone. "I don't take deliveries after 5 p.m. Tell him to go fuck off."

Hearing this, Maria repeated Loki's words into the phone. Oddly enough, the security officer did not respond. "Uh, Steve. I think something bad is about to happen."

*Knock knock*

The duo paused in their actions, not sure of what to do. No one made a move for the front door, instead they resorted to smashing a few glass cases to gather weapons. "Loki, can you see who's out there?" Steve shouted.

On the inside, Loki was fuming at what he just witness. Those pathetic people destroying his items. In a huff, the man told the two that he couldn't access the cameras in the hall way. "As long as you don't speak to them or invite him in, I think we'll be safe." Steve mentioned to the vampire slayer.

Several minutes passed and nothing happened. "Maybe Thor stopped pursuing us." Maria said as she took her shoes off and reclined on a leather couch. "I wouldn't let my guard down if I were you." He said as he crept towards the door. Steve pressed his ear against the wood to hear if anyone was speaking outside. Surprisingly, not a single word was spoken in the hallway. Steve then peeked through the peep hole. What he saw, startled him. On the other side of the door was Clint Barton. He seemed to be in a trance, waiting for someone to answer the door.

As much as Steve wanted to open the door and shove that girlfriend banger to the floor, he knew that once these doors opened, Thor would have all access to him and the others.

He watched Barton for a few minutes, and nothing had changed in the hall way until the elevator opened in the background. Steve noticed Thor the second he stepped out. The blond vampire had a flaming bottle in hand. Raising his arm high, Thor through the Molotov at the door.

Steve backed away as the door caught fire. The man turned around and hurriedly instructed Maria to put her shoes on. The woman scrambled to get them on her feet and tripped over Loki's coffee table. "No bimbo moments, get your ass up." Steve said as he yanked his girlfriend off the floor.

Inside the panic room, Loki watched as Steve and the woman threw items at the window. What could those imbeciles be doing now? The vampire hunter wondered. Well, he didn't have to guess any longer because the pair broke his window and in the process, 200 + thousands in ancient artifacts were destroyed. The duo then yanked down curtains off his walls and secured them around a pillar nearby.

Steve looked back towards the entrance. That door looked like it would crumble any time now. With this in mind, Steve grabbed a statue off the bar counter and rushed to the window. He grabbed the curtains and slowly lowered himself to the window below the penthouse. While he assaulted the glass, Steve called out for Maria to follow.

She began to lower herself when the front door collapsed, by now, the entrance hall was clouded by smoke and covered in sporadic areas of flames. Maria tried to quicken her actions when someone stepped through the smoke and yanked her up by her hair, but instead of lifting the woman upwards, the person pulled out a large patch of hair with a bit of scalp.

Maria shrieked in pain, and reached for her head when a hand pulled her up. She came face to face with Thor who appeared slightly apologetic for the hair mis-hap. "My lady, I don't mean to mar your beauty...well, what's left."

Maria struggled in his grasp, trying to pull away. But the vice like grip was too much for her strength. Thor pulled into an embrace and began to lick her neck. "Darling, why fight when you know you want it." He bit his own tongue and shove the bloody flesh into her mouth. The woman squirmed for a second until the blood took effect.

At Steve's location, the man could be seen running down the street. Pushing past several tourist, not wanting to turn back.


	17. Man on Board

**Chapter sixteen: Man on Board**

* * *

Ever since the defrost, Steve has been finding himself at Burger King for no particular reason. Well, this time, he found comfort in the smell of fast food and dirty rest-rooms. As he sat there, his phone rang for the first time in several hours. What he heard was Loki Laufeyson, it surprised him that the man had his number. But when the guy explained that he used Maria's phone, it all made sense. "So are you coming over or not. Those creeps finally left the premise." Loki said.

Steve told the man that he would be there and soon, he was on his way to the penthouse. After obtaining a map and taking two bus rides, Steve finally arrived at Loki's place of residence. A fire crew and the police could be seen outside the building.

The vampire hunter stood across the street watching as the firemen attempted to put out the fire in his penthouse.

"Why'd you call me back? Are you willing to help me now?" Steve said as he moved to stand by Loki. "Hell no, I am here to serve you with legal papers." Loki said as he shoved the documents into Steve's hands.

Steve flared with rage and dropped the papers onto the ground. Smashing his shoes on the documents and rubbing whatever dirt that was on them onto the white sheets, the growled. How dare he do this! Steve needed his help, and Loki decided that he was going to act like a total douche-bag! Seeing red, Steve raised his hand in a threatening manner, as he prepared to hit Loki.

The raven-haired man flinched, before pointing towards the police across the street. "An evening in county, while lovely, won't do you any favors, kid." Loki pointed out, half-smug and half-afraid, as he waited for Steve to stop menacing him.

Slowly, the super-soldier lowered his hands. His blue eyes trained on the vampire-hunter, Steve kept his hands balled into fist, as they rested by his sides. "So... now what? I go home and let Thor get me?"

Loki scoffed, "You're not my problem, kid." Crossing his arms when Steve looked ready to kill, the scrawny man continued. "Besides, I told you before that I didn't want to become involved in your death-match with the vampire."

Steve mentally shrugged; partially accepting that Loki was right-he never made him any promises. His countenance, however, remained ablaze with wrath. "Can you at least give me a ride back to my place? I ran out of bus-fare."

The vampire-hunter tapped his chin, as if in deep thought. Steve grunted and stamped his foot in response to the man's patronizing nonchalance. "Climb into a tiny, metal box, with a raging lunatic that wants naught more than to run me through?" Steve stomped again. Loki pursed his lips, not liking being interrupted one bit, and continued: "It gets worse. We'll be on a highway-Valhalla forbid you kill me before then-driving, at seventy... nay, eighty-miles per hour, surrounded by hundreds of cars."

Steve groaned aloud and hit his palm on his forehead, at Loki's grim summary. "Will you take me, or not?"

Loki smirked at Steve's desperation, "Well... how can I say 'no' to a pretty face like yours'?" The super-soldier cringed at the vampire-hunter's next words. "Just promise that you'll take me up to your bedchamber and allow me to stay, until I receive the benefits from my insurance claim-I swear on my mother's grave that I will not molest you. Honestly-" He crossed his hand over his heart. "Just remember; I like the top bunk."

Steve grimaced. "I don't have a bunk bed."

"Well, then... you get the floor." Loki reached into his pocket and retrieved his car keys. Jingling the keys, the raven-haired man raised one of his thin, arched eyebrows. "You mustn't keep me in suspense, what'll it be?"

Steve looked between Loki's face and the shimmering car-keys in his hand. "Hell no!" The super-soldier exclaims, before lunging forward and grabbing the vampire-hunter by his waist. The man shrieked girlishly, and tried to beat Steve off. Alas, his panicked swatting and kicking did nothing. Steve effortlessly hoisted the skinny Loki over his broad shoulder, and took off before the police noticed that just kidnapped Hard Rock Hotel's famous employee.


	18. Weapons?

**Chapter seventeen: Weapons?**

* * *

He found Loki's car with ease, and quickly deposited the man into the passenger's seat-when he tried to scamper out of the car, Steve kicked him square in the chest. Loki deflated; curling into a ball of sobs and agony, as he held his hands to his surely broken sternum. "AUGH! My lawyers are going to have a field day with you!" He threatened.

Steve climbed into the driver's seat and slammed the door. Jamming the key into the ignition and ignoring Loki's complaints, Steve backed out of the parking space.

"Are you listening to me, you nitwit! I'm going to destroy you!" Loki kicked and screamed for about a half hour, before he finally realized that wasn't going to work. Breathing steadily through his nose, the raven-haired man sat up on his elbows. Looking at Steve with burning eyes. "First rule of kidnapping; if your going to kidnap me, Loki Laufeyson, at least have the decency to talk to me!"

Peeking out the corner of his eye, Steve could have sworn that the man was... pouting. Cringing, the super-soldier shrank away from Loki and went back to focusing on the road. Last thing he needed was this guy creepin' on him, as well. "When you agree to help me kill Thor; I promise to hold a conversation with you that doesn't involve death-threats."

Loki leaned his head on his right hand, and looked boredly at the side of Steve's head. His wide pale-green eyes held a child-like wonder-which, was completely overshadowed by the creepy, totally evil, shark-toothed smile on his face. "No death-threats? Oh, kid... where's the fun in that?" Loki's free hand danced it's way over to Steve's thigh, and the super-soldier slammed his foot on the gas when he felt fingers trace the seam of his pant-leg.

Loki lurched forward and busted his head on the dashboard, as the car was pushed to it's acceleration-limit. Pulling himself up and securing himself in his seat, the man cursed. "What the Hel! I was just pulling your leg!" Loki omitted the 'no pun intended' part, when Steve looked at him fully and glared hotly; his cheeks alight with a crimson flush.

"I will kill you, if you ever try that again." Steve warned; gripping the wheel angrily and easing his foot off the acceleration. The speedometer had trickled down to 40 mph and stayed there for some time, before the super-soldier had finally calmed down-and in that time, Loki was praying to every deity that he knew of. Please... don't let this psycho kill him!

Clinging to the armrests of his chair, Loki watched Steve warily. "How far are we from your house?" The anxious man asked, as he pushed himself into the door. He feared that his words would cause the super-soldier to attack him.

Steve sighed in annoyance, not wanting to say any more to Loki. He gave the raven-haired man a quick glance. "Probably another 15 minutes."

Hearing these words, Loki tried his best to stay in good grace with Steve for the remainder of the ride. Eventually they pulled up in front of Steve's home. "All father Odin, your home's structure looks horrendous!" Loki said as he poked his head out of the driver's window. Steve pushed the raven-haired man back into his seat and climbed out of the vehicle. "Hey!" Loki called out. Steve looked back to the man. "We can not slay a vampire without proper equipment." He motioned for the trunk.

Following his guiding hand, Steve opened the trunk and found multiple unregistered weapons. "Where did you get these and what were you planning to do with them?" Steve said as he gathered some fire-arms. Loki stepped out the car and joined Steve at the back of the vehicle.

"That is none of your concern." The man snatched a VBR-Belgium PDW from Steve's grasp and checked for bullets. "Ah, these aren't loaded." He said, slightly miffed at the discovery. Searching through the trunk, the man found what he was looking for.

He handed back the weapon and a load of ammunition to Steve. "Get to reloading, I don't have all day." The super-soldier complied with his orders, just to stop himself from murdering the pompous vampire slayer in broad day-light.

Soon the duo were ready for battle. Steve guided the man to Thor's front door. "I need you to break every window you come across." He instructed before kicking down the front door. As Loki carried out his orders, Steve headed upstairs to the master bedroom.

When he got inside, the man went for the closet. A swift kick sent wooden paneling to the floor and Steve was greeted with the white room beyond the small opening. He crept inside and listened out for noise. What he heard was a whimper from the third cell. He peeked through the window to find Maria looking back at him. "Steve?" The woman shouted, but suddenly, the floor dropped out!

Steve pressed his face into the glass and watched his girlfriend disappear into the abyss below her cell. Scrunching his face up in Captain America-fashion, Steve stepped back from the door before charging it with his shoulder and busting it down. "Loki! Get your ass up here! I think I found Thor's cubby-hole!"

In a few moments, the raven-haired man was at his side; breathing too closely at the back of Steve's neck, as he peaked over his shoulder at the newly-accessible room. "Well... what would you know?" Loki smirked. "Ladies, first?"

Steve stepped aside, "Go on ahead, then, M'lady." The super-soldier bowed his head, and received a wimpy slap on his back.

Loki pushed passed Steve and jumped down into the hole in the floor. The super-soldier followed then after.


	19. The Pits of Godliness

**Chapter eighteen: The Pits of Godliness**

* * *

When Steve landed on the ground below, he was surprised to have fallen on top of something soft. He expected the ground to be cold and hard-like underground dirt would be. Shifting around until he was upright, he patted himself down to make sure all his weapons were still on his person. As he did so, Steve felt the ground stir underneath his body and the sound of groaning reached his ears.

"Aaaaah, you asshole! You're sitting on my fucking leg!" Loki cried out; throwing his arms up and pushing at Steve's large, muscled back. The vampire-hunter had tears in his eyes, as the larger man clambered off him as quickly as possible. Sitting up, Loki hollered, when a bolt of pain rocketed up his leg-from his shin to his pelvis, agony radiated dangerously. Looking down at his injured limb, the raven-haired man cried out angrily. "You broke my leg, you dick!"

Steve held his hands up defensively, "I'm sorry." _No he wasn't_. The super-soldier didn't feel an ounce of guilt; not even as they were surrounded by a pack of Thor's hungry vampire-fledglings. If worst came to worst; Steve would leave Loki behind to be eaten alive.

Loki seemed to be able to read minds, because he grabbed Steve's forearm tightly and glared up at him. "If I die here, I swear-I'll haunt you from beyond the grave. And my first order of business will be swiping that precious V-card of yours'."

Steve narrowed his eyes at Loki, not really following what the man was saying to him. What the hell was a V-card? The surrounding vampires seemed to know what the slayer was talking about; they began to laugh and hiss, as they cornered the two mortals. Steve ended up with an armful of Loki, before he knew what the hell was happening. "Get off me, man!" The super-soldier complained, as wiry arms wrapped around his neck.

"Now, now, my children..." Thor's voice echoed throughout the space, and the vampires backed away. The ravenous aura wafting off of them faded, but the danger was still there; like the scent of onions-no matter how much you tried to wash it off, the stubborn aroma clung to your skin. "This is no way to treat our guests, especially your uncle Loki."

Steve snapped his head towards Loki; who looked ashamed at the title. "How come you didn't warn me that this freak was your brother!" Steve whispered harshly into Loki's ear. The raven-haired man pushed the super-soldier off the dirt mound. "You never asked! Instead, you threatened and beat me. There was no way I would tell you anything!" Loki shouted at the larger man.

Seeing that the vampires were closing in on them, Steve pulled his weapon out of the holster and unloaded the entire clip on the surrounding vamps. They all screamed in agony, yet the bullets did little to no harm. "You dunce, fire some holes into the ceiling." Steve did exactly what the hunter said. Instantly, several holes formed around the duo, filtering light into the darkness.

"Ah, you two sure know how to put on a show." Thor said as he stepped towards the two. His movements caused Steve to climb back onto the mound. "But, do you honestly think that you could last in that light forever? We can certainly outlast the daytime." Thor then focused his gaze on Steve. "My dear neighbor, I have a little surprise for you." The blond vampire raised his hand, signaling Maria to step through the crowd. As She stood by her maker, Steve noticed the stark contrast of her white sun dress and the surrounding back drop.

The woman that stood by Thor seemed to be different...Ah, who is he kidding. The chick was a vampire. Thor must have turned her when they were still at the penthouse. Oh well, that mean't that Steve was no longer tied down to that whore. Yes!

Looking between the couple, and seeing the tensed expression on Steve's face. Thor decided to evoke a little more emotions out of Steve. The man popped out of his shirt, causing buttons to spray onto the dirt. When he removed his top, it revealed a very toned upper body. He then raised a severely unkempt finger nail to his bare chest.

Thor released a sensual moan, as he sliced into the skin over his left pectoral muscle. In an instant, blood began to seep from the self inflicted wound. He then guided Maria's mouth to the red liquid. The woman along with Thor began to moan in unison. Ooh, did it sound so naughty. _Make it stop..._

As this happened, Thor did not notice the circle forming around him. The vampire did not take into account that his _children_ had not fed in years, nor did he expect a ravenous feeding frenzy to break out. Soon, every single vampire fought to drink from their maker's bloody breast. "Oooh, ooh. OUCH! Down I tell you, DOWN!" Thor commanded, yet it failed to get his subordinates to back down.

Steve and Loki looked on in disgust. Those vampires were relentless. It almost seemed like they were overpowering Thor. With this in mind, Loki gave Steve a side glace. "Is this scene giving you any useful ideas?" Steve began to shake his head as a sign of '_no_', when something crossed his mind. "Do you by any chance have explosives?" He whispered to the injured man. Loki mentally checked his stock pile "I may have a few M67s left, but they're all in my trunk."

Watching as the mauling session worsened by every second, Steve told Loki that he would give him a boost out of the room, so that he could retrieve the grenades. The raven-haired man protested, citing that his broken leg would slow him down. Steve shut down any more opportunities for Loki to decline and used his strength to hoist the thinner man through the hole in the ceiling. As soon as the shuffling upstairs ceased, Steve settled back into the lit portion on the dirt mound.

As all of this transpired, Thor grew weaker from every drop of blood lost from his body, he used what remained of his incredible strength to toss each and every vampire away from his exposed chest. "You mongrels know no boundaries!" The angered vampire raised his hand above his head. A faint sound could be heard from a distant place above the group.

Not to long ago, Loki had managed to get to his car. The sad part is, that idiot had locked the doors and taken the keys down into that dreadful pit, so this prevented the man from gathering the needed items. Placing his sleeve back into his mouth, Loki limped back into the house. The only thing he thought would aid Steve was to widen the holes in the floor. This would buy the super-soldier some more time.

The hunter moved behind an arm chair and started to move it, when something slammed into his only operational leg. The object severed his leg as it fell through the floor. As this happened, Loki let out a blood curdling scream that rattled the majority of the people in the neighborhood.

In a flash, Thor had his hammer in hand. But what surprised him was the shower of blood from above. Thor and his posse quickly scrambled to the make shift shower and danced in joy. The more he drank, the stronger Thor felt.

Steve stood in horror, knowing that something had happened to Loki. Connecting the dots, Steve realized that the hammer had torn through Loki's weak frame, yet the other man still made noise upstairs.

Steve had to put a stop to this situation and fast, because he knew that the hunter upstairs would never survive the next couple of minutes without any medical assistance.

Would shooting this creep in the heart work, or would he have to stake him?

Steve pondered for a second. Well, he had to do something. So he settled for the '_Shoot first, stake later'_. Steve reloaded his weapon and sprayed the group of vampires. The ones nearest him dispersed to expose Thor in the middle.

The blond glared at Steve. "How dare you interrupt such a glorious feast." Thor then kicked a bit of dirty into Steve's face, and as expected, the action caused Steve to flinch and close his eyes in pain. This allowed Thor to throw his hammer at the man unnoticed. The force of the blow pushed Steve into the wall on the far side of the room.

The super-soldier laid there, pinned in place. Unable to move the object that slowly suppressed his breathing. He tried to shift around, but doing that only aggravated the broken ribs and possible internal bleeding.

Thor watched the scene with bright eyes. "Sir Steve, you should have minded your own business when you had the chance." He crossed the basement to stand in front of Steve. "I wanted nothing but your mother's full attention, but then I saw your handsome face on that fateful day." His hand caressed Steve's cheek. Steve jerk his head away from the touch, then he bit the vampires fingers.

Thor snatched his hand back. "You sure are a feisty one." The vampire said as he licked his finger tips. Steve turned his head in disgust, and discreetly slipped his hand into the folds of his shirt. Thank god for button-up shirts. As the super-soldier slowly felt around for the stake he hid inside his top, he felt Thor lick a stripe across his cheek. Instinctively, the man pulled his hand out of his top and wiped Thor's saliva of his face. With his shirt vacant, Thor took this opportunity to reach one of his hulking-hands into Steve's shirt.

With the vampire's hand in his shirt, Steve knew he was a goner if the other-worldly man found his stake. Trembling, the super-soldier tried to think of a way out of this mess. He had to act fast, though; because the more time Thor's hand spent where it didn't belong, the more ravenous the vampire got!

Steve's hands scrambled to Thor's leather-bound wrist, as his worst fear came to fruition. The vampire's sausage fingers brushed against the stake-the wooden peg scrapped harshly against Steve's rips, as Thor moved his hand around to fully grip the object. "What do you have here?" The vampire said with a sing-song voice, as his free hand reached up and snatched Steve's shirt open.

Like his shirt before, Steve's buttons sprayed all over the ground. Thor's eyes widened when he caught sight of what he was holding onto-a stake! But, the vampire hadn't the time to react to his discovery, as Steve was plunging a different stake into his chest.

Thor let out an unnatural shriek, as he stumbled away from the super-soldier and held his hand to his steadily bleeding wound. Cursing Steve and the ground he stood upon, the vampire fell onto the ground and was immediately set upon by his newborn-vamps. Thor's screams could barely be heard amongst the guffawing and moaning of the feasting group.

Steve tried to breathe deeply-tried to shake off the feeling of suffocation and vertigo-but, with the mighty hammer resting neatly on his chest; he could do nothing more than die. Clenching his eyes shut, the super-soldier cursed Loki; who probably escaped the house... or died trying.

Just as Steve heard Thor let out another one of those spine-chilling cries of the night, and braced himself for whatever was about to happen; the ceiling above them collapsed inwards and a healthy amount a sun light shone into the basement. Loki's face could be seen from the hole above.

The paleness of his face and the sunken eyes confirmed that Loki was suffering from severe blood loss. With the last of his strength, Loki tossed the end of a rope. "Come on, I secured it."

Steve grunted. "I can't move, this hammer won't budge." Even the super-soldier was slowly weakening with every passing second.

Loki rolled his eyes, "You spent fifteen minutes getting frisky with the vampire, and yet, you never ask him to take his damned magical hammer of your chest?" Ducking out of sight, the vampire-hunter dragged himself over to his (Thor's) stockpile of alcohol and began stuffing rags down the neck of the bottles. When Loki appeared back at the top of the hole, Steve noted that the man was no longer wearing his shirt.

_What was wrong with everyone? Were they allergic to their shirts? _

Loki smirked, as he brought his lighter into view. "Like what you see, kid? If we make it out of here; you owe me dinner and a movie." Setting the first bottle ablaze, Loki called out, "Fire in the hole!" Before tossing the Molotov at the horde of vampires.

Steve immediately felt the heat, and panted as the fire started eating away at the oxygen. "Loki! You're going to roast me down here!" The super-soldier cursed when Loki didn't respond to his complaints, and instead continued to throw his Molotov's; like a woman throws her boyfriend's clothes out the window. _What a strange thought to have right now. _

As the vampires caught alight, they jumped off their wounded master and began running around in a frenzy! Maria was the first to meet the light, in an attempt to put out the fire on herself out. Steve shed a single tear, as he watched her explode into black sand and CGI effects.

"HAHAHA! The bitch is finally dead!" Loki cackled evilly, as he went to light another bottle. "Since that little hussy left her shoes at my place, I'm under questioning for kidnapping and child endangerment! Next time you get a girlfriend, Steve, keep them out of my home!"

Maria started a trend amongst the vampires; they all began running into the lit portions of the room-and soon, they all got the true-death. Thor was the last one standing; but, that was because he wasn't on fire, yet. Loki would take care of that.

Labored breathing could be heard as Thor grunted loudly while yanking the stake from his chest. The vampire trembled with rage as he scrambled to his feet to lunge at Steve.

With perfect timing, Loki released the Molotov from his grasp and watched as it shattered on the vampire's back, releasing the burning contents. This caused Thor to scream in pain. The creature pawed at his skin before doing the_ 'stop, drop and roll' _method. Seeing the vampire's actions, Loki threw a second Molotov at his brother before lowering himself via the rope. He then dragged himself over to Steve's gun by the dirt mound and then retrieved the forgotten stake at Steve's feet.

He sat himself in an upright position before unloading the remaining bullets into the vampire. In seconds, the vampire's movements ceased.

Knowing that he was close to death, the soft whispers of the gods could be heard around him, Loki crawled over to Thor. Steeling himself for the oncoming blistering from the flames, Loki climbed onto Thor's burning body and plunged the stake into his exposed heart.

The creature below him screeched loudly. It threw Loki off as it frantically pulled at it's chest. As he slowly disintegrated, the vampire focused its attention on the raven-haired man. Thor groaned a noise that sounded like brother before he crumbled into ashes.

Even though they vanquished the foul beast, Loki couldn't help feeling a tinge of sorrow for his now deceased brother. A tear escaped his eye as he stared at the ash pile. Slowly, he ran his fingers through the dirt and lifted a handful to his face.

As he tried to stop the flooding childhood memories from drowning him in sadness, the man heard some shuffling in the silent pit. This caused Loki to tense and face towards the noise. What he saw was the man that dragged him into this dreadful situation.

"I understand that you're mourning, but we need to get to a hospital." Steve said through a clenched jaw as he stood over Loki, his hunched posture and bruising, revealed the extent of his injuries.

With teary eyes, the raven-haired man could only nod in agreement.


	20. Epilogue

**A/N:** _I would like to thank all the people that read and reviewed my precious baby. Wow, this is it...Well, enjoy your summer!_

**Epilogue**

* * *

Months later, Steve found himself in front of a mirror fixing his tie and spraying some cologne on his neck. Making sure he looked sharp, the super-soldier exited his apartment. Down the stairs and in the parking lot, the man felt his phone ring in his pocket. Fishing it out, he quickly answered, "Hello?"

On the other line was Natasha, she sounded more or less exasperated. "I called your home-phone and you didn't answer. What the hell are you up to now?"

Steve put his phone between his shoulder and his ear, as the man searched his pockets for a comb. "Been busy... got a date."

Natasha's eye-roll could be heard, "Your tramp hasn't even been dead a year, Steve!"

A car pulled up by Steve, and the man quickly said "good-bye" to Natasha, before hanging up. Behind the wheel of the vehicle was none other than Loki, he pulled his sunglasses up to give Steve a stern look. "When I said Seven Post Meridiem, I meant Seven Post Meridiem! I had to drive around this gods-forsaken parking lot for a hour and a half!"

The super-soldier shrugged, before walking around the car and letting himself in. "I'll make it up to you-hey, I'll buy dinner!" He flashed the vampire-hunter his all-American smile.

Loki scoffed, before putting the car in Drive and pulling off towards the exit of the parking garage. "You're already treating, you dolt!" Hitting the brakes right before they drove through the security check-point, the raven-haired man glared at Steve. "Next time, just be on time." This time, it was Steve's turn to stare. "What makes you think there'll be a next time?"

As they pulled onto the street and drove to their destination, Loki put his sunglasses back in place, before putting his hand on Steve's thigh. "You made me kill my brother, you jackass-I'm not going to let you off easy!"


End file.
